150 Movies You Should Die Before You See - Miller Steve [28]
Thumbs Down Rating:
The Crappies
The Worst Director Award goes to … Trey Parker for making a movie that almost loses its comedic momentum because he couldn't figure out how to end some scenes and pads others. The Special Recognition for Advancing Minorities in Film Award goes to … Trey Parker for creating the Nihonjin Indian tribe, which consisted entirely of Japanese actors and extras.
They Really Said It!
Alferd Packer: Yeah, I hid in Wyoming for a while. I should have let them kill me.
Polly Pry: Why?
Alferd Packer: You ever been to Wyoming?
Betcha Didn't Know
The Nihonjin tribe was played by Japanese exchange students attending the University of Colorado at Boulder. The chief of the tribe was played by Masao Maki, a restaurant owner from Boulder, Colorado.
Trey Parker plays Alferd Packer, although he is credited as Juan Schwartz. This is a subtle joke, as Juan Schwartz is a variation of the name Packer lived under while hiding from the law after the cannibal accusations were leveled against him.
Trivia Quiz
What is Alferd Packer known for?
A: Discovering the Grand Canyon
B: Inventing the Spork
C: First person tried and convicted for cannibalism in the United States, and the only convicted cannibal from Colorado
D: Coining the phrase, “It tastes like chicken.”
Answer: C. Alferd Packer was convicted of manslaughter in 1886 and sentenced to forty years in prison. He was paroled in 1901, went to work as a security guard at the Denver Post, and died in 1907.
DEMENTIA 13
(AKA “THE HAUNTED AND THE HUNTED”)
Filmgroup Productions, 1963
PRODUCER Roger Corman
WRITERS Francis Coppola and Jack Hill
DIRECTOR Francis Coppola
STARS Luana Anders (Louise Haloran), William Campbell (Richard Haloran), Patrick Magee (Justin Caleb), Mary Mitchel (Kane), Bart Patton (Billy Haloran), and Ethne Dunne (Lady Haloran)
After her husband dies of a heart attack, Louise (Anders) covers up his death and enacts a scheme to gain the trust of her mentally unstable mother-in-law. Her plan is working well … until a crazed ax murderer shows up.
Why It Sucks
The only reason any serious critic would be found in the same room with this film is because it was made by Francis Ford Coppola while he was a gofer/assistant director for low-budget movie mogul Roger Corman. Sadly, it's mostly a snoozer. Every scene drags its feet before it gets going and hangs around long after the viewer wants to end his or her misery with a shotgun.
Thumbs Down Rating:
The Crappies
The Worst Auteuer Award goes to … Francis Coppola for creating a movie that was so lame after its second cut that the producer hired a second writer (and ghost director) in an attempt to pump up the excitement.
And the Worst Actress Award goes to … Ethne Dunne as Lady Haloran for playing a part that needed to have a touch of the sinister but instead turning in a performance that makes Tipper Gore look like Lady Gaga.
They Really Said It!
Kane: Sometimes I think you see me as a Christmas tree ornament.
Betcha Didn't Know
This was the directorial and scripting debut of Francis Ford Coppola, in a time before he became a sensation so huge that only three names could properly describe him.
The film was shot simultaneously with The Young Racers, another Roger Corman production, using many of the same actors, locations, and leftover budget dollars.
Trivia Quiz
What iconic horror character has not been featured in a film produced or directed by Francis Ford Coppola?
A: Dracula
B: Frankenstein's monster
C: The Invisible Man
D: Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde
Answer: C. Coppola directed films about Dracula (1992) and Frankenstein (1994) and was the executive producer of a television version of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1999).
HANGMEN
Cinema Sciences Corporation, 1987
PRODUCERS Robert J. Anderson (executive producer), J. Christian Ingvordson, Steven W. Kaman, and Richard R. Washburn (producers)
WRITERS