A Lesser Evil - Lesley Pearse [103]
Looking out on to the dreary rain-washed street, Fifi couldn’t help but wish she could go back to the beginning and start again, this time thinking things through at every step. She could have told her mother when she first met Dan, got him to call for her so it didn’t look as though she was hiding something shameful. She certainly shouldn’t have rushed into marrying him the way she did.
Miss Diamond was definitely right in saying it should have been her who looked for the flat, not Dan. People were wary of him because he looked so tough, but she could have got round a very cautious landlord.
But she couldn’t go back, so what was she to do now?
Glancing out of the window, she saw Yvette going through her front door, so she thought she would call on her and get her opinion.
‘Ah, Fifi!’ Yvette exclaimed as she opened the front door and found her neighbour standing there. ‘’Ow are you?’
‘Fine, thank you,’ Fifi replied, even though she was close to tears. ‘Could I come in for a chat? You’ve been out every time I’ve called over.’
‘I am a leetle busy,’ Yvette replied.
‘Just for a few minutes,’ Fifi pleaded. ‘I’ve missed you.’
She observed that Yvette was pale and drawn, the dark circles under her eyes suggesting she hadn’t slept much recently. She took this to mean the dressmaker was as troubled by what had happened next door as herself.
‘Okay,’ Yvette sighed. ‘I was just going to make some coffee anyway.’
Number 12 was exactly the same as all the houses in the street, and Yvette’s flat was identical to Frank’s, with two adjoining rooms and the kitchen at the end of a communal long hallway. But number 12 was very dirty and neglected. The wallpaper on the stairs must have been put up before the war and it was worn away where people rubbed against it. The hall floor didn’t look as if it had been swept or washed for years. Mr and Mrs Balstrode who lived upstairs were elderly, so perhaps they couldn’t manage cleaning, but Fifi wondered why Yvette didn’t do it.
But it was obvious from her kitchen that Yvette didn’t care much about her surroundings. Although not dirty, it was dingy and disorganized. She took a percolator down from a shelf, filled the bottom with water, put a couple of tablespoons of fresh ground coffee in the top and lit the gas beneath it.
‘You will have the plaster taken off soon?’ she asked.
Fifi thought it funny that people asked about that all the time, as if it was really important, but didn’t want to discuss more serious problems. ‘Just another week,’ she said. ‘I wish I could get over all this other stuff as easily. Are you finding it hard too?’
Yvette nodded, glancing out of the window towards the Muckles’ kitchen window which faced hers beyond a six-foot fence. ‘I find it hard to live ’ere any more.’
‘At least it’s quiet now,’ Fifi said, but realizing how callous that sounded she blushed. ‘Oops, I shouldn’t have said that!’
‘We should say it how it is.’ Yvette shrugged. ‘It is quiet now, that is good. I do not miss all the trouble, the fighting, the insults. I weesh to forget.’
‘I want to too,’ Fifi said. ‘But I can’t stop thinking about them.’
‘You must, Fifi,’ Yvette said reprovingly. ‘They are not worth a moment’s thought. You and your Dan, you should go out and ’ave good time together. Find a new home and move away.’
‘But I will be a witness at the trial,’ Fifi said. ‘Until that is over I can’t forget about them.’
The water in the percolator began to boil and bubble up and the aroma of coffee filled the small kitchen. Yvette put some dainty china on a tray and milk in a jug. ‘Just because you ’ave to be witness does not mean you have to halt your life. You ’ave had much sadness losing your baby, Fifi. Do not bring more sadness into your life by wasting a moment of it on that family.’
Yvette put the percolator on the tray and then lifted the whole thing. ‘We will go into the front room,’ she said. ‘You have a cup of coffee, a leetle chat, then you go home.’
It was a great disappointment