A Sicilian Husband - Kate Walker [68]
‘Do you have to ask? If you don’t know, then your English mustn’t be quite as good as you thought. There’s a nice simple word that explains last night perfectly—a nice, simple four-letter word! It’s lust, Gio—or sex—nothing more, nothing less…’
‘No! It was more than that. Much more!’
‘Oh, please! Don’t lie to me! You don’t have to pretend! We’re both adults.’
‘I’m not lying! And I’m not pretending about anything. I don’t want you to go. I want you to stay!’
‘As what?’
Bitterness overwhelmed her so that she had to force the words out past the hard, tight knot in her throat.
‘As a governess for Paolo? Is that it? Is that what you want?’
She saw his face change, saw realisation dawn in the depths of his eyes, and knew that at last the truth had hit home.
‘You heard?’
‘Of course I heard. And I understood—well, some of it. I may not know very much Italian, so I have to admit that I was a bit fazed by—what was it—bambin—something.’
‘Bambinaia,’ Gio supplied, his tone as flat as his expression.
‘But I’d have to be pretty thick not to make a guess at governante, wouldn’t I, Gio? I think even someone with as little Italian as me could have a go at that one. It does mean governess, doesn’t it? And I presume that the first one means nanny or something—a nanny for Paolo. An English nanny—that’s what you were looking for, isn’t it?’
She was relieved to see that at least Gio had the grace not to deny it. That he nodded in silent agreement.
‘An English nanny for your son—and I fell into your lap at just the right moment. An English nanny for Paolo—an English bedmate for you—and if you were truly, truly lucky, an English mother for your next baby. What was the whole plan, Gio? Did you reckon on marrying me so that I’d do it all for free? So that you didn’t even have to find a nanny’s wages?’
‘No.’
The blazing glare he turned on her would have quelled anyone else. But Terrie was beyond feeling any more pain. Impervious to his anger as a result of her own bitter fury.
‘No,’ she repeated, injecting every ounce of bite she could into the words. ‘No, of course not. Because you see, caro mio Gio, your plan failed. I’m not going to be used as just a nanny for Paolo. And I’m not going to be just a bedmate for you. And, as I’ve already said, I’m—’
‘You’re not leaving.’
‘Oh, but I am…’
She tried to reach for the wardrobe door to open it again, but Gio moved too quickly for her, ramming his foot hard up against it so that it was impossible to move.
‘No you’re not! I won’t let you! I won’t let this happen!’
‘You can’t stop me!’
‘I’ll try everything I can. And I warn you I can play dirty if I have to…’
Oh, why wouldn’t he give in? Terrie was weakening, reaching the end of her emotional strength. She didn’t know how much longer she could keep up this fight.
‘Gio—please! Don’t do this to me! You can’t force me to stay. I’m begging you to let me go!’
The change in his face was shocking. All the anger, the furious resistance leeched from it in a rush, leaving him looking dreadfully pale and drained.
‘All right,’ he said slowly. ‘If that’s what you want.’
It was the exact opposite of what she wanted but, with the situation as it was, there was nothing else she could do. She couldn’t stay here, loving him, and knowing that he had only ever wanted to use her all the time. ‘Don’t ask me to give you anything more than I can manage,’ he had said last night, and now she knew why. He had nothing to give her, emotionally. Nothing at all.
‘But I hope you’re prepared.’
Terrie had been picking up the dresses he had tossed on the bed, planning on folding them, putting them in her case, but his words froze her hands. Turning, she looked at him frowningly, bruised eyes puzzled and unsure.
‘Prepared for what?’
‘For the fact that I will be phoning you every single night, without fail.’
‘Phoning? But Gio—why?’
Gio rubbed the back of his hand across his eyes in a gesture that spoke strangely of exhaustion and defeat.
‘Do you remember when I told you about Lucia—how I said