A Spy by Nature - Charles Cumming [74]
‘I find it so hard, Kathy. To relax.’
‘Oh, come on,’ she says, tossing her face up to the ceiling. She finds my cautiousness disappointing.
‘You’re right…’
‘You know I am. I know what’s best for you. What about Saul? Why don’t you go out with him more?’
‘With Saul? He’s always busy. Always got a new girlfriend on the go.’
‘Yes,’ she says quietly, standing and picking up the two empty glasses from the table.
‘Let me give you a hand with those.’
‘No no, that’s OK.’ As she moves towards the kitchen she is shaking her head. ‘You’re so serious, Alec. So serious. Always have been.’
I don’t reply. It is as if she is angry with me.
‘You want another drink?’ she calls out.
‘No thanks. I’ve had one too many.’
‘Me too,’ she says, coming back in. ‘I have to go to the bathroom.’
‘Fine.’
‘Be here when I get back?’
‘I’m not going anywhere.’
I had expected it: when she returns from the bathroom, Katharine is yawning, the elegant sinew and muscle on her neck stretched out in fine strands. She slumps down on the sofa and says: ‘Excuse me. Oh, I’m sorry. Must be tired.’
I take the cue. The hint is broad enough.
‘I should be going, Kathy. It’s late.’
‘No, don’t,’ she says, jerking up out of her seat with a suddenness which gives me new hope. ‘It’s so nice having you here. I’m just a little sleepy, that’s all.’
She rests her hand lightly on my leg. Why is she blowing so hot and cold?
‘That’s why I should be going. If you’re sleepy.’
‘Why don’t you stay the night? It’s Sunday tomorrow.’
‘No. You’ll want to be on your own.’
‘Not at all. I hate being alone. Strange noises. It would be nice if you slept over.’
‘You sure?’
‘Sure I’m sure.’
‘Because that would be great if I could. I’d save the money on a taxi.’
‘Well there you go, then. It’s settled.’ She beams, lots of teeth. ‘It’ll be just me and you. You can look out for me. Be my protector.’
‘Well if I’m going to do that I should sleep on the sofa. See the burglars coming in.’
‘You won’t be all that comfortable.’
‘Well, where do you suggest I sleep?’
I put as much ambiguity into this as it is comfortable to risk, but Katharine doesn’t pick it up.
‘Well, there’s always Fortner’s room,’ she says. ‘I can change the sheets.’
Not what I wanted her to say.
‘That’s a chore. You don’t want to be doing that at this time of night.’
‘No really. It’s no problem.’
I scratch my temple.
‘Look, maybe I should just get a taxi. Maybe you’d prefer it if I went.’
‘No. Stay. I’ll fetch you a blanket.’
‘You have one spare?’
‘Yeah. I got plenty.’
She twists up from the sofa, her left sock hanging loose off the toes, and walks back down the corridor.
‘There you go,’ she says, returning with a green chequered rug draped over her arm. She lays it on the sofa beside me. ‘Need a pillow?’
She yawns again.
‘No, the cushions will be fine.’
‘OK, then. Well I’m gonna get some sleep. Shout if you need anything.’
‘I will.’
And she leaves the room.
I am not sure that there was anything else I could have done. For a moment, sex was hovering in the background like a secret promise, but it was too much of a risk to make a move. I could not have been certain of her response. But now I am alone, still clothed, still wide awake, feeling cramped and uncomfortable on a Habitat sofa. I regret talking her into letting me stay the night: I only did it in the hope of being asked to join her in bed. I’d like to be on my way home, working back through the night’s conversations, thinking them through and noting them down. But now I am stuck here for what will be at least six or seven hours.
Katharine goes into her room after snuffing out the light in the passage, and I hear the firm closing thunk of her bedroom door.
At around two o’clock, perhaps a little later, I hear the noise of footsteps in the corridor. A quiet tip-toe in the dark. I turn on the sofa to face out into the darkened room, eyes squinting as a light comes on in the passage.
I make out Katharine’s silhouette in the door. She pauses there, and the room is so quiet that I can hear her breathing. She is coming towards