A Test of Wills - Charles Todd [55]
Royston flushed but said, “No. I don’t gamble, I haven’t time for wasting my money in other pursuits, and I’m well paid.”
“Have you ever borrowed money from Harris?”
Unprepared for that, Royston’s eyes flickered. “Once,” he said tightly. “Many years ago, when I got into the devil of a scrape and couldn’t get out of it on my own. I was twenty-one.”
“What did you do?”
Royston hesitated. “I borrowed his car without his knowledge. There was a girl I desperately wanted to see down in Dorset because I thought I was madly in love with her. Colonel Harris—Captain, he was then—was in Palestine, and at the time it didn’t seem like such a crazy thing to do, taking the car.” He stopped, and then added quickly, “There was an accident. I wasn’t a very experienced driver, and so it was my fault, whatever the law said. I paid for what I’d done—in more ways than one. And there were hospital bills. Among other things I’d badly damaged a kidney. That’s what kept me out of the war, later. Charles lent me the money to settle it all. Within five years I’d paid him back every penny.”
“It must have been a large sum.”
“Any sum is large when you’re twenty-one and frightened out of your wits. But yes—it was large. The car wasn’t mine, remember. And—someone was hurt. It took every ounce of courage I had to confess to Charles. All he said was, ‘You’ve had a bad experience. But there’s no going back to change it. So try to learn from it. That’s the only restitution you can offer.’”
“And did you?”
The eyes meeting his were level and sober. “For eight years or more I had nightmares about it. The accident, I mean. Reliving it. I don’t hold with Freud’s nonsense about dreams, but I can tell you that nightmares strip the soul.”
Rutledge found no answer for that.
Sally Davenant watched her cousin for a while, then said, “Mark, that’s the fifth time you’ve read that page. Put the book down, for God’s sake, and tell me what’s wrong.”
“Nothing,” he said, smiling up at her. “I was thinking, that’s all.”
“Don’t tell me ‘nothing’ when I know there is something. You’ve walked around like a man in torment for days now. And why aren’t you at Mallows? Lettice must be frantic with grief, and surely there’s something you can do for her, if only to hold her. You did that for me after Hugh died, and it was all that got me through those first ghastly days. And there are practical considerations—who’s arranging the funeral? You can’t leave it to that dreadful man Carfield, he’ll give us a sickeningly long eulogy comparing poor Charles to Pericles or Alexander. And the solicitors in London could do worse, with something coldly formal and military. Lettice will know best what Charles would have wanted—the right scripture, hymns, and so on.”
“She’s still under Dr. Warren’s care—”
“Do you think being drugged into helplessness is going to solve anything for her? What’s wrong, I ask you again. Something is! You spent every free moment at Mallows until the day Charles died, and it’s going to look decidedly odd if you aren’t there now!”
He took a deep breath, then said, “If I’m suspected of the murder—and they wouldn’t have brought in Scotland Yard, would they, if they’d believed it was Mavers, they’d have hauled him to jail and been done with it!—I can hardly go to Lettice with that sort of thing being whispered all through the county.”
She regarded him thoughtfully, half in amusement and half in exasperation. “Mark, my dear, that’s carrying good manners to absurd extremes! Do you think Lettice will care what the county believes? She’ll want you beside her, and that in itself will silence most of the gossips!”
There was such desperate grief in his eyes now that she was suddenly appalled. “Mark—,” she began, anxiety changing her voice, making it strained and wary.
“The first time I went, I was turned away—if I go again, and it happens a second time, what do you think will be made of that?”
Almost weak with relief, she said, “She’d been given a sedative! Did you expect Dr.