A Voyage to Arcturus [29]
I did not see how we could very well pass. However, I went slowly on, and presently we drew near enough together for me to recognise the walker. It was Slofork, the so - called sorcerer. I had never met him before, but I knew him by his peculiarities of person. He was of a bright gamboge colour and possessed a very long, proboscis - like nose, which appeared to be a useful organ, but did not add to his beauty, as I knew beauty. He was dubbed 'sorcerer' from his wondrous skill in budding limbs and organs. The tale is told that one evening he slowly sawed his leg off with a blunt stone and then lay for two days in agony while his new leg was sprouting. He was not reputed to be a consistently wise man, but he had periodical flashes of penetration and audacity that none could equal.
"We sat down and faced one another, about two yards apart.
"'Which of us walks over the other?' asked Slofork. His manner was as calm as the day itself, but, to my young nature, terrible with hidden terrors. I smiled at him, but did not wish for this humiliation. We continued sitting thus, in a friendly way, for many minutes.
"What is greater than Pleasure?' he asked suddenly.
"I was at an age when one wishes to be thought equal to any emergency, so, concealing my surprise, I applied myself to the conversation, as if it were for that purpose we had met.
"'Pain,' I replied, 'for pain drives out pleasure.'
'What is greater than Pain?' "I reflected. 'Love. Because we will accept our loved one's share of pain.'
" 'But what is greater than Love?' he persisted.
"'Nothing, Slofork.'
"'And what is Nothing?'
"'That you must tell me.'
"'Tell you I will. This is Shaping's world. He that is a good child here, knows pleasure, pain, and love, and gets his rewards. But there's another world - not Shaping's and there all this is unknown, and another order of things reigns. That world we call Nothing - but it is not Nothing, but Something.'
"There was a pause.
"'I have heard,' said I, 'that you are good at growing and ungrowing organs?'
"'That's not enough for me. Every organ tells me the same story. I want to hear different stories.'
"'Is it true, what men say, that your wisdom flows and ebbs in pulses?'
"'Quite true,' replied Slofork. 'But those you had it from did not add that they have always mistaken the flow for the ebb.'
"'My experience is,' said I sententiously, 'that wisdom is misery.'
"' Perhaps it is, young man, but you have never learned that, and never will. For you the world will continue to wear a noble, awful face. You will never rise above mysticism.... But be happy in your own way.'
"Before I realised what he was doing, he jumped tranquilly from the path, down into the empty void. He crashed with ever - increasing momentum toward the valley below. I screeched, flung myself down on the ground, and shut my eyes.
"Often have I wondered which of my ill - considered, juvenile remarks it was that caused this sudden resolution on his part to commit suicide. Whichever it might be, since then I have made it a rigid law never to speak for my own pleasure, but only to help others.
"I came eventually to the Marest. I threaded its mazes in terror for four days. I was frightened of death, but still more terrified at the possibility of losing my sacred attitude toward life. When I was nearly through, and was beginning to congratulate myself, I stumbled across the third extraordinary personage of my experience - the grim Muremaker. It was under horrible circumstances. On an afternoon, cloudy and stormy, I saw, suspended in the air without visible support, a living man. He was hanging in an upright position in front of a cliff - a yawning gulf, a thousand feet deep, lay beneath his feet. I climbed as near as I could, and looked on. He saw me, and made a wry grimace, like one who wishes to turn his humiliation into humour. The spectacle so astounded me that I could not even grasp what had happened.
"'I am Muremaker," he cried in a scraping voice which shocked my ears. 'All
"We sat down and faced one another, about two yards apart.
"'Which of us walks over the other?' asked Slofork. His manner was as calm as the day itself, but, to my young nature, terrible with hidden terrors. I smiled at him, but did not wish for this humiliation. We continued sitting thus, in a friendly way, for many minutes.
"What is greater than Pleasure?' he asked suddenly.
"I was at an age when one wishes to be thought equal to any emergency, so, concealing my surprise, I applied myself to the conversation, as if it were for that purpose we had met.
"'Pain,' I replied, 'for pain drives out pleasure.'
'What is greater than Pain?' "I reflected. 'Love. Because we will accept our loved one's share of pain.'
" 'But what is greater than Love?' he persisted.
"'Nothing, Slofork.'
"'And what is Nothing?'
"'That you must tell me.'
"'Tell you I will. This is Shaping's world. He that is a good child here, knows pleasure, pain, and love, and gets his rewards. But there's another world - not Shaping's and there all this is unknown, and another order of things reigns. That world we call Nothing - but it is not Nothing, but Something.'
"There was a pause.
"'I have heard,' said I, 'that you are good at growing and ungrowing organs?'
"'That's not enough for me. Every organ tells me the same story. I want to hear different stories.'
"'Is it true, what men say, that your wisdom flows and ebbs in pulses?'
"'Quite true,' replied Slofork. 'But those you had it from did not add that they have always mistaken the flow for the ebb.'
"'My experience is,' said I sententiously, 'that wisdom is misery.'
"' Perhaps it is, young man, but you have never learned that, and never will. For you the world will continue to wear a noble, awful face. You will never rise above mysticism.... But be happy in your own way.'
"Before I realised what he was doing, he jumped tranquilly from the path, down into the empty void. He crashed with ever - increasing momentum toward the valley below. I screeched, flung myself down on the ground, and shut my eyes.
"Often have I wondered which of my ill - considered, juvenile remarks it was that caused this sudden resolution on his part to commit suicide. Whichever it might be, since then I have made it a rigid law never to speak for my own pleasure, but only to help others.
"I came eventually to the Marest. I threaded its mazes in terror for four days. I was frightened of death, but still more terrified at the possibility of losing my sacred attitude toward life. When I was nearly through, and was beginning to congratulate myself, I stumbled across the third extraordinary personage of my experience - the grim Muremaker. It was under horrible circumstances. On an afternoon, cloudy and stormy, I saw, suspended in the air without visible support, a living man. He was hanging in an upright position in front of a cliff - a yawning gulf, a thousand feet deep, lay beneath his feet. I climbed as near as I could, and looked on. He saw me, and made a wry grimace, like one who wishes to turn his humiliation into humour. The spectacle so astounded me that I could not even grasp what had happened.
"'I am Muremaker," he cried in a scraping voice which shocked my ears. 'All