A Wall of Light - Edeet Ravel [38]
Dori
Jonathan’s leaving Eldar! He’s going to another kibbutz with his parents.
I think it’s because of his father. His father who eats blood. Because when I told Daddy about the blood he didn’t want to talk about it but he believed me and he said nothing about Oded would surprise me.
Jonathan’s leaving tomorrow morning. This is our last time in the same Group.
Baby Diary
July 14
The doctor saw the rash, suggested putting [illegible] for a few days. He said it’s not serious, rather something that is common to many babies. She’s very cute. She’s quiet, easy, sleeps well, and is growing. She already doesn’t look like a new baby. Her face is pretty, sweet. The order of her feedings today was: I gave all the feedings 4:00 a.m.–8:00–11:00–3:30–6:30–midnight–6:30. [sic]
Today Naftali took David to Nahariya. I don’t feel pressured to spend time with him. It’s completely different with two children. Even though I feel more confident and calm with Dori compared to my experience with a first child, I want to spend time with David. I also worry about him but I can’t devote myself to him as before. Sometimes it works out that I can be with him the entire evening and sometimes almost nothing at all.
And also all Dori’s accomplishments, I don’t manage to switch with Naftali at the moment that she does them. With David we were always together in the evening. Now I’m completely alone. Naftali visits during the day but it’s not the same.
Dori
That whole business with tying Elan to the bed again. I’m really getting fed up with that business.
At least this time we didn’t have to watch.
Our First Year
4 May 1949. Most of the ploughing for the vegetable gardens has been completed.
The 60 dunams or so of Arab grapevines have been pruned.
One of the buildings has been converted into a chicken run.
A new machine and tool shed is under construction.
Sturdily and attractively designed new tables have been finished by our carpentry shop for the new Dining Hall, which will soon be ready for use.
Our first fifty pullets arrived, and we are anxiously awaiting the arrival of a thousand chicks.
Dori
That Alice in Wonderland.
If you’re going to turn into a pig dear I’ll have nothing more to do with you. I laugh and Daddy laughs and we both laugh until we can’t stop.
Daddy puts on the radio to hear the news. I don’t understand a single word. It’s in Hebrew but not the kind I know.
The man on the radio says good evening and Daddy answers good evening. I ask Daddy why do you say good evening—you know he can’t hear you. Daddy smiles and says it’s friendly.
I make a fist and bang the bump on Daddy’s forehead because that doesn’t exactly make sense. I ask why is Jonathan leaving? but Daddy doesn’t want to say. I ask can we go visit him on his new kibbutz and he says it might be hard to get there. I ask is it far and he doesn’t know what to say. Finally he says it might be complicated to get there. I guess it’s far away across the mountains.
The pundak48 song comes on. I love that song. It’s my favourite song in Hebrew—
And the balladeer said
Never mind never mind
And he raised a glass
To the heroes of the past
In the smoke—whistle, cluck—of the small
pundak
I don’t know all the words and I don’t know what a pundak is or a balladeer but I love the tune and how the balladeer says never mind never mind and the whistle and cluck. I asked Daddy what a pundak is but he shrugged his shoulders and didn’t know what to say. Finally he said a place where people sit. Why would there be a word for a place where people sit?
I actually had a record in Canada with the pundak song but unfortunately I sat on it by mistake and it broke into two pieces. I cried and cried but Daddy laughed. He said he’d get another one but he couldn’t find that record in Canada.
Eldar Eldar Eldar.
Eldar Eldar Eldar
Dori
I really really don’t want to go back tonight. I’m going to say I’m sick and then Daddy will have to stay with me.
I say I think I have fever. Daddy kisses