A Woman-Hater [202]
she. "There--I must give up loving women. Besides, they throw me over the moment a man comes, if it happens to be the right one."
"Unnatural creatures!" said Vizard.
"Ungrateful, at all events."
"Do you think she has gone into a convent?"
"Not she. In the first place, she is a Protestant; and, in the second, she is not a fool."
"I will advertise."
"The idea!"
"Do you think I am going to sit down with my hands before me, and lose her forever?"
"No, indeed; I don't think you are that sort of a man at all, ha! ha!"
"Oh, Miss Gale, pity me. Tell me how to find her. That Fanny Dover says women are only enigmas to men; they understand one another."
"What," said Rhoda, turning swiftly on him; "does that little chit pretend to read my noble Ina?"
"If she cannot, perhaps you can. You are so shrewd. Do tell me, what does it all mean?"
"It means nothing at all, I dare say; only a woman's impulse. They are such geese at times, every one of them."
"Oh, if I did but know what country she is in, I would ransack it."
"Hum!--countries are biggish places."
"I don't care."
"What will you give me to tell you where she is at this moment?"
"All I have in the world."
"That is sufficient. Well, then, first assign me your estates; then fetch me an ordnance map of creation, and I will put my finger on her."
"You little mocking fiend, you!"
"I am not. I'm a tall, beneficent angel; and I'll tell you where she is--for nothing. Keep your land: who wants it?--it is only a bother."
"For pity's sake, don't trifle with me."
"I never will, where your heart is interested. She is at Zutzig."
"Ah, you good girl! She has written to you."
"Not a line, the monster! And I'll serve her out. I'll teach her to play hide-and-seek with Gale, M.D.!"
"Zutzig!" said Vizard; "how can you know?"
"What does that matter? Well, yes--I will reveal the mental process. First of all, she has gone to her mother."
"How do you know that?"
"Oh, dear, dear, dear! Because that is where every daughter goes in trouble. I should--she _has._ Fancy you not seeing that--why, Fanny Dover would have told you that much in a moment. But now you will have to thank _my_ mother for teaching me Attention, the parent of Memory. Pray, sir, who were the witnesses to that abominable marriage of hers?"
"I remember two, Baron Hompesch--"
"No, Count Hompesch."
"And Count Meurice."
"Viscount. What, have you forgotten Herr Formes, Fraulein Graafe, Zug the Capellmeister, and her very mother? Come now, whose daughter is she?"
"I forget, I'm sure."
"Walter Ferris and Eva Klosking, of Zutzig, in Denmark. Pack--start for Copenhagen. Consult an ordnance map there. Find out Zutzig. Go to Zutzig, and you have got her. It is some hole in a wilderness, and she can't escape."
"You clever little angel! I'll be there in three days. Do you really think I shall succeed?"
"Your own fault if you don't. She has run into a _cul-de-sac_ through being too clever; and, besides, women sometimes run away just to be caught, and hide on purpose to be found. I should not wonder if she has said to herself, 'He will find me if he loves me so very, very much--I'll try him.'"
"Not a word more, angelic fox," said Vizard; "I'm off to Zutzig."
He went out on fire. She opened the window and screeched after him, "Everything is fair after her behavior to me. Take her a book of those spiritual songs she is so fond of. 'Johnny comes marching home,' is worth the lot, I reckon."
Away went Vizard; found Copenhagen with ease; Zutzig with difficulty, being a small village. But once there, he soon found the farmhouse of Eva Klosking. He drove up to the door. A Danish laborer came out from the stable directly; and a buxom girl, with pale golden hair, opened the door. These two seized his luggage, and conveyed it into the house, and the hired vehicle to the stable. Vizard thought it must be an inn.
The girl bubbled melodious sounds, and ran off and brought a sweet, venerable name. Vizard recognized Eva Klosking at once. The old lady said,
"Unnatural creatures!" said Vizard.
"Ungrateful, at all events."
"Do you think she has gone into a convent?"
"Not she. In the first place, she is a Protestant; and, in the second, she is not a fool."
"I will advertise."
"The idea!"
"Do you think I am going to sit down with my hands before me, and lose her forever?"
"No, indeed; I don't think you are that sort of a man at all, ha! ha!"
"Oh, Miss Gale, pity me. Tell me how to find her. That Fanny Dover says women are only enigmas to men; they understand one another."
"What," said Rhoda, turning swiftly on him; "does that little chit pretend to read my noble Ina?"
"If she cannot, perhaps you can. You are so shrewd. Do tell me, what does it all mean?"
"It means nothing at all, I dare say; only a woman's impulse. They are such geese at times, every one of them."
"Oh, if I did but know what country she is in, I would ransack it."
"Hum!--countries are biggish places."
"I don't care."
"What will you give me to tell you where she is at this moment?"
"All I have in the world."
"That is sufficient. Well, then, first assign me your estates; then fetch me an ordnance map of creation, and I will put my finger on her."
"You little mocking fiend, you!"
"I am not. I'm a tall, beneficent angel; and I'll tell you where she is--for nothing. Keep your land: who wants it?--it is only a bother."
"For pity's sake, don't trifle with me."
"I never will, where your heart is interested. She is at Zutzig."
"Ah, you good girl! She has written to you."
"Not a line, the monster! And I'll serve her out. I'll teach her to play hide-and-seek with Gale, M.D.!"
"Zutzig!" said Vizard; "how can you know?"
"What does that matter? Well, yes--I will reveal the mental process. First of all, she has gone to her mother."
"How do you know that?"
"Oh, dear, dear, dear! Because that is where every daughter goes in trouble. I should--she _has._ Fancy you not seeing that--why, Fanny Dover would have told you that much in a moment. But now you will have to thank _my_ mother for teaching me Attention, the parent of Memory. Pray, sir, who were the witnesses to that abominable marriage of hers?"
"I remember two, Baron Hompesch--"
"No, Count Hompesch."
"And Count Meurice."
"Viscount. What, have you forgotten Herr Formes, Fraulein Graafe, Zug the Capellmeister, and her very mother? Come now, whose daughter is she?"
"I forget, I'm sure."
"Walter Ferris and Eva Klosking, of Zutzig, in Denmark. Pack--start for Copenhagen. Consult an ordnance map there. Find out Zutzig. Go to Zutzig, and you have got her. It is some hole in a wilderness, and she can't escape."
"You clever little angel! I'll be there in three days. Do you really think I shall succeed?"
"Your own fault if you don't. She has run into a _cul-de-sac_ through being too clever; and, besides, women sometimes run away just to be caught, and hide on purpose to be found. I should not wonder if she has said to herself, 'He will find me if he loves me so very, very much--I'll try him.'"
"Not a word more, angelic fox," said Vizard; "I'm off to Zutzig."
He went out on fire. She opened the window and screeched after him, "Everything is fair after her behavior to me. Take her a book of those spiritual songs she is so fond of. 'Johnny comes marching home,' is worth the lot, I reckon."
Away went Vizard; found Copenhagen with ease; Zutzig with difficulty, being a small village. But once there, he soon found the farmhouse of Eva Klosking. He drove up to the door. A Danish laborer came out from the stable directly; and a buxom girl, with pale golden hair, opened the door. These two seized his luggage, and conveyed it into the house, and the hired vehicle to the stable. Vizard thought it must be an inn.
The girl bubbled melodious sounds, and ran off and brought a sweet, venerable name. Vizard recognized Eva Klosking at once. The old lady said,