All She Ever Wanted - Barbara Freethy [124]
"And that excuses it?"
"That incident has nothing to do with our lives now." Drew shrugged out of his sports coat, opening the back door of the car to toss it inside. "Can we do this at home? This isn't the best place to have a discussion."
"There's never a good time or a good place for you to talk. This suits me fine."
"We're in the parking lot of your old sorority house."
"Exactly. This is where it began, Drew. Where we really fell in love. Or was it just me who did the falling?" She searched his blue eyes for the truth, but as always Drew was very good at hiding his thoughts and feelings from her.
"I married you, didn't I?" he said wearily.
It wasn't exactly a declaration of love. "Why did you marry me? Was it because of my parents? My father's law school connections? My money?"
His gaze hardened. "Are you sure you want me to answer those questions?"
A shiver of fear ran down her spine. Was she being brave or stupid? Was she about to ruin her life and the lives of her children? She turned her head and gazed at the sorority house, drawing strength from the lessons she'd learned there and the people she'd known, especially Emily. Emily wouldn't have wanted her to waste her life, drifting, accepting instead of challenging and demanding. "Yes," she said. "I do want answers."
Please, God, let them be the right answers.
"All of the above," Drew replied.
His words took the wind out of her sails. Well, now she knew, didn't she?
"And I—I loved you," Drew added. The words didn't flow smoothly from his mouth, but then, Drew had never felt comfortable talking about feelings.
"Do you still love me?"
"I'm here, aren't I?"
"Why are you here? And where have you been? I left a dozen messages that you didn't return. I know you were in L.A. on personal business. Dad told me." Laura drew in a deep breath and asked the question that had been rambling around in her mind for a long time. "Are you having an affair?"
"No," he said forcefully.
"Then why are you being so secretive? Where have you been the last week? And why couldn't you tell me?"
"Laura, I really don't want to do this here. Let's get in the car and drive home."
"No. It's here and now. Because later there will be another excuse why we can't continue this discussion. Answer the question, Drew."
"Or what?" he challenged her. "Because that sounds like an ultimatum."
She licked her lips, feeling nervous again. Did she really want to give him an ultimatum? What if he left? What if her marriage ended right here? What would she do then?
She'd survive. She'd go on with her life. She'd be all right.
The answers came from deep within her soul.
Squaring her shoulders, she straightened up and said, "Don't turn this around on me, Drew. I want to know what you were doing in L.A."
He studied her as if she were on the witness stand. "All right. I went to L.A. to talk to Garrett Malone. When I got there, I realized he was Professor Martin. I knew he and Emily had had an affair. I caught them one day. She made me promise not to tell," he said, putting up a hand when Laura started to interrupt. "And I agreed. We all had secrets. She deserved to have one, too."
"If Emily had a secret, you had something on her," Laura said, suddenly seeing the clear picture. "She couldn't tell anyone you gave her the drugs or you would reveal that she was having an affair. Is that what you went to tell her the night of the party?"
"I'd already told her that. I went there to see if she'd written anything in her journal about me."
"I wonder why she didn't write it down."
"She probably didn't want to incriminate herself."
Laura shook her head, not liking any of Drew's answers. But at least he was being honest. "All right. So you went to L.A. to talk to the professor. What happened?"
"I caught up with him before his book signing. I told him I knew who he was."
"How did you know? I saw him, and I didn't recognize him."
"His disguise was good," Drew admitted. "But I figured he was the one behind the book, so I just bluffed, and he admitted everything. I told him to get