Alva and Irva - Edward Carey [21]
And then one day, incredibly, surprisingly, Grandfather ordered us to go and visit our friend Miss Stott. We did not understand then the deception behind Grandfather’s command. Miss Stott had made each of us a set of clothes, each identical to the other, but we thought nothing of this, we had always worn identical clothing. But we did notice that this set was smarter than the other sets, and had a blazer with it.
Other people wanted us now, and Mother would have to let those other people have us promptly at nine every morning. Mercifully though they would allow her to retrieve us at four o’clock every afternoon. If we did not change hands every day at those hours, which was, incidentally, the law, we would be taken away from Mother permanently. ‘It’s all for the good,’ Grandfather told Mother, ‘the law is correct. This law is the best thing that could happen to them. It may be a little hard to begin with, but they cannot stay at home all their lives.’
So every day, in sombre preparation, as the date came ever closer, we walked up to the gates with Grandfather, nervously, with terror on our faces. And then one morning Mother scrunched up her pudgy hands into little fists, rubbed her leaking eyes and bade goodbye to her twin loves, who arrived on Littsen Street to find the gates were open and to see that there were noisy and rough children everywhere. On that day a woman we had never seen before came up to Grandfather and said, ‘Alva and Irva Dapps?’ And Grandfather nodded, and the woman said, ‘Thank you, you may leave them now, goodbye postmaster.’ And Grandfather, looking somewhat anxious, on this terrible day when we learnt that even his great authority had limits, left Irva and me all alone with this woman we had never seen before.
A SET OF FEMALE TWINS
ONCE ATTENDED
THE SCHOOL ON LITTSEN STREET
The Littsen Street Educational Establishment
Nos. 75-125 Littsen Street made up the collection of buildings that were designed specifically to contain the difficult business of educating children. The buildings had a high wall around them to keep knowledge in and ignorance out, and, in the midpoint of the wall that gave onto the street, a formidable iron gate. The architect of this school either received a pitifully small budget in which to complete his brief, or else he lacked any imagination, or else he was one of those undeniably cunning individuals who realise that no matter how sincere a child’s intention to study may be, that child is, on occasion, liable to look out of the classroom window in the hope of distraction. Thus he ensured that the architecture on view from any of the school buildings onto any other of the school buildings contained very few distractional properties. Unfortunately, blocks of domestic dwellings today stand in the school’s place. However, the school on Pulvin Street (a short walk from the University or Market Square, see map), which was constructed at the same time, though at the other end of the city, is identical, and a visit there will give much the