American Medical Association Family Medical Guide - American Medical Association [229]
• Inform your teen about all available contraceptive techniques (see page 470). Condoms help prevent pregnancy and provide some protection against STDs. If you are not sure about the facts, refer your child to a family planning clinic such as Planned Parenthood. Reassure your child that all health visits and records are confidential.
• Accept your child’s sexuality; if your child tells you that he or she is homosexual (or if you think he or she may be), accept the possibility and get information and support from a support organization such as Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG).
Psychological, Emotional, and Behavioral Development
The physical, mental, and emotional changes that take place during adolescence can make it an especially difficult time for both the adolescent and his or her parents. At the same time that relationships are getting more complicated, classes are getting harder and peer pressure is at its peak.
Independence is necessary for healthy growth, and it helps teens learn to make good choices. Most teens get through these years safely by learning through experience, sometimes making some bad choices that have no long-term, harmful consequences. Adolescents learn to become independent by expressing their individuality in a number of ways, such as through music, clothes, or hairstyles. These forms of rebellion are often part of a teenager’s growth toward independence and maturity. In some cases, however, teens make poor choices, or their life experiences become too difficult for them to handle. Other teens may develop psychological or emotional problems that require treatment by mental health professionals.
The severity of a teen’s behavior or emotions is usually what distinguishes the average teen from one who has psychological or emotional problems. Here are some ways to tell if your teen’s behavior is normal or if he or she is having problems coping. Most teens:
• Are sad sometimes or cry easily—but their mood eventually improves.
• Worry about their appearance and experiment with diets or exercise programs—but don’t jeopardize their health.
• Skip a class or two—but not enough to fail a class or get poor grades.
• Worry about their popularity—but not to the point where they are unable to deal with everyday life.
Mental and Emotional Health in Teens: What Can Parents Do?
Although their friends and peers are of increasing importance, for most teenagers, parents and family are the most important influences. Use your influence to help your children face the many choices and decisions they have to make at this time in their lives.
• Be available, both physically and emotionally. Spend as much time as you can with your children.
• Show affection. Hug or kiss your children or use words to show that you care about them.
• Compliment teenagers often and tell them you are proud of them.
• Set clear, reasonable expectations for your children.
• Be a good role model. Behave in the way you want your children to behave.
• Spend more time listening than talking. Showing an interest in what your children have to say makes them feel important and boosts their self-esteem.
• Don’t be judgmental. Accepting your children’s ideas and feelings will make them more likely to confide in you.
• Do not compare your child to other children.
• Never ridicule your child.
• Give advice, not orders. Avoid nagging. Teens need reliable information from someone they trust, but they have to learn many things for themselves.
• Take an interest in your children’s activities.
• Get to know your children’s friends. Are they people you want your child to be around? Your teen is likely to drink alcohol or smoke cigarettes if his or her friends do. Having a friend who has attempted suicide is strongly associated with a teen’s own risk of suicide.
• Stay in contact with your children’s teachers. Keep