An Engagement in Seattle - Debbie Macomber [36]
“I’m afraid to leave her,” she whispered brokenly. The time had come for the truth, painful though it was. Julia was surprised she’d chosen to voice it to Alek and not her brother.
“Why?” her husband inquired gently.
She was glad he was standing behind her and couldn’t see the tears in her eyes. “If Ruth dies, when she dies, a part of me will go with her.” The best part, Julia feared. Something would perish in her own heart. Her faith in God and in herself would be shaken, and she wondered if this time the damage would be beyond repair.
“Do you wish to bind her to this life, this pain?”
“No,” Julia answered honestly. Yet she held on to Ruth fiercely.
A part of Julia had died with her father. It had been joy. Trust had vanished afterward when she realized everything he’d told her about Roger was true. She hadn’t wanted to believe her father, had argued with him, fought with him. It was while they were shouting at each other that he’d suffered the heart attack that had prematurely claimed his life.
Joy had faded from her soul that afternoon, replaced by guilt. In the years since, she’d made a semicom-fortable life for herself. She wasn’t happy, nor was she unhappy. She buried herself in her work, the desire to succeed propelling her forward, dictating her actions. Her goal was to undo the damage Roger had done to the company. First she would rebuild Conrad Industries to its former glory and then continue on the course her father had so carefully charted.
She was making progress, not only with the company, but with her life. Encouraged by Ruth, Julia was just beginning to recapture some of the enthusiasm she’d lost. She could laugh occasionally, even joke every now and then.
It had seemed impossible that she’d ever again feel anything but the weight of her sadness. Then, without being aware of the transformation, she realized she was feeling again, and it had started after her marriage to Alek.
Now here she was, trapped in pain and fear, and it was too soon. Much too soon.
“Come.” Alek took her by the shoulders.
She followed because she didn’t have the strength to resist. Leaning forward, she kissed Ruth’s cheek and felt the tears run down her own.
Alek gently guided his wife from the hospital room. He kept his arm around her, wanting to lend her his strength. She would never admit she needed him, never confess she was pleased he’d come to be with her. He’d been at the airport that afternoon, dealing with the Immigration people, working out the final details of his sister’s entry into the country. He’d been torn between his duty to his sister and Julia.
Alek found he was weary of this constant battle between them. She fought him at every turn, cheated him out of her love. Yet he’d begun to love her and was more determined than ever to win her heart.
He knew only bits and pieces of the past. Even Jerry seemed reluctant to discuss Julia’s relationship with Roger Stanhope.
Whenever his friend mentioned the other man’s name, Jerry’s mouth tightened and anger flashed in his eyes. Because he was often so involved with his own work, Alek couldn’t interact with other staff members as much as he would’ve liked. Recently he’d made a point of doing so.
Over lunch that afternoon, he’d casually dropped Roger Stanhope’s name and was astounded by the abrupt silence that fell over the small gathering.
“If you want to know about Roger, just ask Julia,” someone suggested.
It sounded like an accusation, which puzzled Alek. From the little he was able to surmise, Roger had been blamed for the fire, although presumably nothing was proven or he’d be in jail. Questions abounded. The answers, like so much else in his marriage, would come with time.
Julia was silent on the ride from the hospital to their home. Alek led her into the condo and toward the guest bedroom, where she chose to sleep.
She sat on the edge of the bed like a lifeless doll.
“Would you like some help undressing?” he asked her.
She shook her head. “No, thanks.”
He left her, but not because he wanted to.
Venturing into the kitchen, he made a pot of tea.