An Engagement in Seattle - Debbie Macomber [4]
“I’m so pleased you stopped by,” Ruth said again.
Julia came almost every day, knowing the time left with her grandmother was shrinking. Neither spoke of her death, although it was imminent. Julia was determined to do whatever she could to make these last days as comfortable and happy for her as possible. That was what kept Julia going day after day. She spent hours talking to her grandmother, telling her about Alek’s ideas, the innovations he was currently working on, her own hopes for the company. They discussed the future and how the entire industry was about to change because of Alek’s vision. Her grandmother had been as impressed with Alek as Julia was. Ruth had wanted to meet him, and Julia had asked Jerry to bring Alek over. From what she heard later, the two had been quite charmed by each other.
“I’ve been meaning to talk to you,” Ruth whispered.
She sounded so weak. “Rest,” Julia said urgently. “We’ll talk later.”
Ruth responded with a fragile smile. “I don’t have much longer, Julia. A few weeks at the most.…”
“Nonsense.” The truth was too painful to face, yet much too persistent to ignore. “You’re just tired, that’s all. It’ll pass.”
Ruth’s eyes drifted shut, but determination opened them a moment later. “We need to talk about Roger,” her grandmother said insistently.
A muscle in Julia’s neck tensed, and a cold shiver went down her backbone. “Not…now. Some other time. Later.”
“Might not…have later. Best to do it now.”
“Grandma, please…”
“He betrayed you, child, and you’ve held on to that grief all these years. Your pain is killing you just as surely as this heart of mine is draining away my life.”
“I don’t even think of him anymore.” Julia tried to reassure her, although it was a lie. She struggled to push every thought of Roger from her mind, but that wouldn’t happen until she’d completely rebuilt what he’d destroyed.
“Regret and anger are poisoning you like…like venom.… I’ve watched it happen and been too weak…to help you the way I wanted.”
“Grandma, please, Roger is out of my life. I haven’t seen him in over a year. What’s the point of talking about him now?”
“He’s gone…but you haven’t forgotten him. He failed you.”
Julia clenched her teeth. That was one way of putting it. Roger had failed her. He’d also betrayed, tricked and abandoned her. When she thought of how much she’d loved him, how much she’d trusted him, it made her physically ill. Never again would she allow a man into her heart. Never again would she give a man the power to manipulate her.
“The time’s come to forgive him.”
Julia closed her eyes and shook her head. Her grandmother was asking the impossible. A woman didn’t forgive the things Roger had done. Roger, the company’s onetime director of research and development—and Julia’s fiancé—had taught her the most valuable lesson of her life. She wasn’t going to turn her back on the humiliation he’d caused her. Forgive him? Out of the question. She’d rather bury herself in work, insulate herself from love, than forgive Roger.
“I want you to love again,” Ruth said, but her voice was so frail Julia had to strain to hear. “I don’t think I can die in peace, knowing you’re so miserable.”
“Grandma, how can you say that? Jerry and I are working hard to rebuild the company. We’re on the brink of doing truly amazing things. I’ve told you about them and about everything Aleksandr’s done. How can you say I’m miserable? These are the most challenging, exciting days of my life.”
“None of that means much…not when you’re still imprisoned