An Engagement in Seattle - Debbie Macomber [98]
“The creep.”
Chase agreed with her. “I don’t understand how a man can walk away from his responsibilities like that. What he did to Bunny is bad enough, but to leave those beautiful children…”
“She brought them?”
“No, I asked to see a picture. They’re cute as could be. I felt sorry for her.” He didn’t mention that he’d given her enough money to fill her gas tank so she could get home and paid for a week’s worth of groceries. She hadn’t asked, but he could tell she was in dire financial straits.
“You aren’t interested in a woman with excess baggage?” she asked, almost flippantly. Though he’d only known Lesley a short time, he already knew it wasn’t like her to be so offhand. He suspected something else was bothering her.
“Bunny’s a good woman who didn’t deserve to be treated so badly by the man she’d loved and trusted. The divorce was final less than a week ago. Bunny, and the children, too, need more love and help than I could give them. To answer your question, no, I don’t object to marrying a woman with children.”
Lesley was silent for a long time after that. “My dad left us,” she finally said in a small voice.
Chase chose his words carefully, not knowing how to comment or if he should. “It must have been very hard.”
“I was only six and we were going to Disneyland. Mom had worked a second job in order to save extra money for the trip. Dad took the money when he left.”
“Oh, Lesley, I’m sorry.”
The look in her eyes became distant, as if she were that six-year-old child, reliving the nightmare of being abandoned by her father all over again.
“I know I shouldn’t have blamed myself. I didn’t drive my father away, but for years I was convinced that if I’d been the son he wanted, he’d never have left.”
“Have you had any contact with him since?”
“He called when I was fifteen and wanted to see me.”
“Did you?”
She nodded. “After being so bitterly hurt, I didn’t have a lot of hope for our meeting. It’s funny the things a child will remember about someone. I always thought of my dad as big and strong and invincible. When we met again nine years later, I realized he was weak and selfish. We had lunch together and he told me I could order anything I wanted. I remember I asked for the most expensive thing on the menu even though I didn’t like steak. I barely touched the steak sandwich and took it home for our dog. I made sure he knew he’d paid top dollar to feed our collie, too.”
“What made him contact you after all those years?”
Lesley sighed. “He seemed to want me to absolve him from his guilt. He told me how hard his life had been when he was married to my mother and had a child—me—with all the responsibilities that entails. He claimed he’d married too young, that they’d both made mistakes. He said he couldn’t handle the pressures of constantly being in debt and never having money to do the kinds of things he wanted to do.
“That’s when I learned the truth. My dad walked out on my mother and me because he wanted to race sports cars. Imagine, driving a sports car meaning more to him than his wife and daughter.
“You might think badly of me, but I wouldn’t give him the forgiveness he was seeking—not then. It wasn’t until later, in my early twenties, when I learned he’d died of cancer, that I was able to find it in my heart to forgive him.”
“I don’t know how any fifteen-year-old could have forgiven someone who’d wounded her so deeply,” Chase said, reaching for her hand. She gripped his fingers with surprising strength and intuitively Chase knew she didn’t often share this painful part of her childhood.
She offered him a brief smile and picked up her drink.
“Did your mother ever remarry?”
“Yes,” Lesley answered, “to a wonderful man who’s perfect for her. You’d have to meet my mother to understand. She has a tendency to be something of a curmudgeon. It took her a long time to find the courage to commit herself to another relationship.
“I was out of high school before she married Ken, although they’d dated for years.