Angels Everywhere - Debbie Macomber [85]
The wind blew hard against her as she stood at the railing looking out over the green, murky waters. It amazed her that she could be so outwardly calm and still hurt this badly.
For a moment she feared Chet would choose to leave her there alone, but she was wrong. Soon he joined her. Standing beside her, he braced his elbows against the railing, and looked out over the water. Dusk was setting, and a soft shade of pink brightened the horizon. The wind howled softly in the background.
“I can’t say I don’t love you, if that’s what you’re looking for.” The words were almost accusing, tight with pain.
Monica’s hands were buried deep in her coat pockets. She turned to study him. The wind slapped the loose tendrils of her hair about her face. “Why are you doing this?”
“Damn it, Monica, I don’t want to argue. We both know all the reasons. We’ve been through all this. I’m not going to get involved in another debate with you. One of us has got to keep his head on straight. Do you think I’m enjoying this?”
“No.”
“Accept it, then. It’s over before either of us has more cause for regret.”
So this was what it felt like to die, Monica mused. She closed her eyes as the pain worked through her heart, then slowly nodded.
“Michael’s a good man.”
“I don’t love Michael,” she said evenly. “I love you.”
He ignored her. “I ran a background check on him for you and he’s squeaky clean. You couldn’t ask for better husband material.”
“Don’t, please,” she whispered fervently. She knew what he was doing, but it wasn’t helping.
“If you’re not attracted to Michael, fine. He’s not the only fish in the sea. For that matter I’m not either. You’ll fall in love again. Within a couple of weeks, maybe less.”
Monica’s short laugh was filled with more tears than amusement. “Oh, Chet, don’t you know me at all? Do you honestly believe I’m the kind of woman to walk from one relationship to another? Do you really think I’d ever marry a man I don’t love?”
His lack of response was answer enough. “Just don’t do anything stupid,” he warned.
“Like what?”
“Hell, I don’t know, join a convent or something.”
“That’s for Catholics.”
“I realize that, but knowing you, you’d convert just to spite me. There’s too much passion in you for that, understand? You’ve kept it buried for too damn long as it is. You’ll do fine,” he said starkly, turned, and started to walk away.
“Chet.”
He stopped, and his back and his shoulders stiffened, but he didn’t turn around.
“Would you hold me, please. One last time.”
It looked as if he intended to keep on walking. He took one step, and then another. Monica bit down so hard on her lip to keep from calling for him that she tasted blood. Whatever it was that caused him to change his mind, she would never know.
Before another moment passed she was in his arms. His hold on her was hard and tight. Sobbing, she clung to him.
“You’re a fool,” she told him, weeping so hard, she doubted he could understand her.
“I’ve always been one. Why change now?”
“Because I love you.”
“Yeah, well, that and two bits will buy you a cup of coffee.” He broke away from her so abruptly that she nearly stumbled backward. Gripping her hands with his, he raised her fingers to his mouth. “Dear God, I can’t believe . . .”
“What can’t you believe?”
“Nothing.” He closed his eyes and folded his fingers over hers. “There’s so much I owe you.”
“But, Chet,” she pleaded, “don’t you understand? I’m so grateful for you.”
“This is my gift to you.”
“What,” she sobbed, “breaking my heart?”
“No, letting you go before I screw up your life as much as I have my own.” He dropped her hands, and without another word, turned and walked away.
It was highly uncommon to get a summons from Gabriel while on prayer assignment, and Goodness was convinced she was about to be pulled off the case. She had her arguments all lined up. Good ones too. Matters were going much better than they appeared at first glance. She intended to explain everything,