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Micah came in at my back, hugging us close. Asher finally knelt, more by Nathaniel and me than Richard, but his hand touched Richard’s hair. We all gave what we could.

The crying began to ease, then stop. I felt the tension in his arms, his body, ease. His breath went out in a long, heavy sigh. I felt him settle into the warmth and the touch. I felt all that care and worry drift away in the press of bodies, and caring.

Then he drew in a deep, full breath, and rose up higher on his knees. It was like a man rising from deep water, except that this water was hands and bodies. He rose to his knees, then started struggling to his feet. We all moved back to let him stand.

He smiled down at me, at all of us. “Thank you, all of you. I needed it. I didn’t know how much…” He started to move out of the kneeling circle of us. Jean-Claude and Clay moved back so he could walk out.

He stopped at the foot of the bed, and took a breath so deep his body shuddered with it.

Jean-Claude stood, and helped me to my feet. I didn’t protest the help; I felt shaky. Richard wasn’t the only one who needed to be held tonight.

Everyone got to their feet, in ones and twos. We waited for Richard to say something, or for one of us to think of something worth saying.

He turned back and gave us a smile. It was his old smile, his Boy Scout smile, I used to call it. He looked more relaxed than I’d seen him in a while.

“I’ll bunk in Jason’s room tonight.”

“You don’t have to leave,” I said.

The smile slipped a little, letting some sadness through. “I can’t sleep here, Anita, not with all of them.”

“I don’t think everyone is staying,” I said.

He shrugged. “I don’t want to share you, Anita. Especially tonight. But I saw your face when Nathaniel and Micah held you. You never look that peaceful with me anymore.”

I opened my mouth, to say something comforting, but he held up a hand and stopped me. “Don’t deny it, Anita. I’m not angry, just…” He shook his head. “I don’t know what to do, but I know I can’t share you tonight. It will be dawn soon, and you won’t want Jean-Claude with us. He’s the only one I could stand to share you with tonight.” He shrugged again. “But you’ll want something warmer.” His face struggled to look cheerful, and almost succeeded. “It’s better if I just go. I’ll say, or do, something to upset Anita tonight. I know I will.” His frown turned into something bitter for a second. “I appreciate the comfort, I needed it, but part of me still wishes you were all gone.” With that, he turned on his heel and went for the door.

“Clay,” I said, “go with him.”

Clay didn’t argue, and when he followed him out, Richard didn’t protest. I took it as a good sign. I hoped so, anyway.

19

JEAN-CLAUDE HUGGED ME in against his body. “I am sorry, ma petite.”

Asher came and kissed me on the cheek. “I am not sorry he is gone.”

“Be nice,” I said.

He cuddled in against me, his arm going around Jean-Claude’s shoulders. “We all behaved ourselves admirably and your Ulfric still leaves in a huff.”

Nathaniel came to stand in front of me. He pushed a lock of my hair back from my face. “Honestly, Anita, I’m not sorry he’s staying somewhere else for the night. I want to hold you tonight, and Richard wouldn’t let me in the bed.”

They were both right, so why did I feel like I should defend Richard’s honor?

“Enough of this,” Jean-Claude said, “Ma petite is tired. We will leave her with Micah and Nathaniel.” He kissed my upturned face, gently, his face showing nothing. There were nights when he asked not to be sent away, but tonight he didn’t even try for it.

He let me go, and started for the door, Asher at his side.

“It seems wrong to keep kicking you out of your own bed,” Micah said.

Jean-Claude turned back, and said, “Ma petite is not comfortable when I die at dawn. We will respect her sensibilities in this tonight. She has had enough shocks for one night.”

Asher slipped his arm through Jean-Claude’s. “We’ll be in my room.” I’d seen them arm in arm a hundred times. I’d sent