Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter Colletion_ Books 11-15 - Laurell K. Hamilton [969]
Gabriel had been in charge of the local wereleopards before I had to kill him. He’d being trying to rape and kill me, on film, at the time. Raina had been offstage urging him on. They’d made a lovely couple, in that lower-circle-of-hell sort of way. I’d sent them to hell together on the same night; talk about a double date.
“Yeah, Gabriel liked it serial-killer bad.”
“So did Raina,” Richard said, “though not her body, not for the worst of it.”
“I’m told a good dominant in the bondage and submission scene never asks of their sub what they aren’t willing to do to their own body.”
“That’s the rule,” Richard said, “but we both know that Raina wasn’t a good dominant.”
“No,” I said, “she wasn’t.”
“The cramping easing?” He made it a question.
“Yeah, how did you know?”
“Your face is smoothing out. You’re not clutching as much at your stomach. And I watched Raina work through the same kind of pain, a lot. She said one of the things she liked about me was that I could be as rough as she wanted in exactly the way she wanted it.”
“For future reference, don’t ever fuck me this hard in that position again, okay?”
He nodded. “What position do you like?”
I opened my mouth, closed it. Tried to think of how to phrase it. “I don’t like it this rough on a nightly basis. After a session even close to this rough, it takes a day or two to feel like doing it again.”
“You’ll have to feed the ardeur in a few hours.”
“There are gentler ways to feed it, Richard.”
“Not with Micah there isn’t.”
“Well-endowed doesn’t mean you can’t be gentle, Richard.”
He nodded. “You’re right.”
We stared at each other a moment. Something on his face made me say, “Raina really fucked you up, didn’t she?”
He nodded. “Yes, she did. When she found out I enjoyed it rough, she wanted to make sure I’d never be able to get my needs met anywhere but with her. She meant to keep me, Anita, and if she hadn’t tried to include Gabriel, I might have stayed with her.”
“No, you wouldn’t have,” I said.
He gave me sad eyes. “How can you be so sure?”
“Because you’re a good person, and if it hadn’t been Gabriel it would have been someone or something else. Raina couldn’t resist pushing people past their boundaries. She’d have kept pushing until she broke you; it’s what she did.”
He nodded and took in a breath deep enough that it rocked his broad shoulders. “I’ll clean up in the group showers.”
I wanted him to go, but…He’d tried so hard. He’d actually saved me from Marmee Noir. “You can clean up here.”
He shook his head. “No, I can’t.”
The way he said it seemed odd. “Why not?”
“Because I like the idea I hurt you. I like it a lot. I don’t trust myself not to hurt you again.”
“I’d say no, Richard. You respect no.”
He nodded. “But I also know the effect we have on each other. I don’t trust myself not to try to seduce you again, so that I can push myself inside you while you’re still bleeding from the first time.” He closed his eyes and a shudder ran down him from head to feet. I didn’t think it was because he was repulsed by what he wanted to do; no, it was a shudder of anticipation. He was being honest with me, with himself, about what he wanted.
“I like it rough sometimes, Richard, but not that rough. Sorry.”
He nodded and gave me a sad smile. “Raina helped me enjoy intercourse too rough for anyone else. She made Nathaniel like pain in a way that most people wouldn’t even survive.”
“I know.”
He shook his head. “No, you don’t. You think you know, but you can’t imagine it. I saw some of what she taught him to enjoy.”
“He doesn’t talk like you ever saw him with her,” I said.
“Blindfolds, earplugs, nose plugs; you can’t see, hear, or smell who’s in the room. She invited me over once, tried to get me to help