Anna Karenina (Penguin) - Leo Tolstoy [307]
A man can spend several hours sitting cross-legged in the same position if he knows that nothing prevents him from changing it; but if he knows that he has to sit with his legs crossed like that, he will get cramps, his legs will twitch and strain towards where he would like to stretch them. That was what Vronsky felt with regard to society. Though in the depths of his soul he knew that society was closed to them, he tested whether it might change now and they might be received. But he very soon noticed that, though society was open to him personally, it was closed to Anna. As in the game of cat and mouse, arms that were raised for him were immediately lowered before Anna.
One of the first ladies of Petersburg society whom Vronsky saw was his cousin Betsy.
‘At last!’ she greeted him joyfully. ‘And Anna? I’m so glad! Where are you staying? I can imagine how awful our Petersburg must seem to you after your lovely trip; I can imagine your honeymoon in Rome. What about the divorce? Has that all been done?’
Vronsky noticed that Betsy’s delight diminished when she learned that there had been no divorce as yet.
‘They’ll throw stones at me, I know,’ she said, ‘but I’ll go to see Anna. Yes, I’ll certainly go. Will you be here long?’
And, indeed, she went to see Anna that same day; but her tone was now quite unlike what it used to be. She was obviously proud of her courage and wished Anna to appreciate the faithfulness of her friendship. She stayed less than ten minutes, talking about society news, and as she was leaving said:
‘You haven’t told me when the divorce will be. Granted I’ve thrown my bonnet over the mills, but other starched collars will blow cold on you until you get married. And it’s so simple now. Ça se fait.ar So you leave on Friday? A pity we won’t see more of each other.’
From Betsy’s tone Vronsky could understand what he was to expect from society; but he made another attempt with his family. He had no hopes for his mother. He knew that she, who had so admired Anna when they first became acquainted, was now implacable towards her for having brought about the ruin of her son’s career. But he placed great hopes in Varya, his brother’s wife. He thought that she would not throw stones and would simply and resolutely go to see Anna and receive her.
The day after his arrival Vronsky went to her and, finding her alone, voiced his wish directly.
‘You know, Alexei,’ she said, after hearing him out, ‘how much I love you and how ready I am to do anything for you. But I have kept silent because I know I cannot be useful to you and Anna Arkadyevna,’ she said, articulating ‘Anna Arkadyevna’ with special care. ‘Please don’t think that I condemn her. Never. It may be that in her place I would have done the same thing. I do not and cannot go into the details,’ she said, glancing timidly at his sullen face. ‘But one must call things by their names. You want me to see her, to receive her, and in that way to rehabilitate her in society, but you must understand that I cannot do it. I have growing daughters, and I must live in society for my husband’s sake. If I go to see Anna Arkadyevna, she will understand that I cannot invite her or must do it so that she does not meet those who would take a different view of it, and that will offend her. I cannot raise her ...’
‘I don’t consider that she has fallen any more than hundreds of other women whom you do receive!’ Vronsky interrupted her still more sullenly, and silently got up, realizing that