Anything but Normal - Melody Carlson [59]
“Are you okay, sweetie?”
Sophie sat up and looked at Mom. “Huh?”
“Sorry about that little fireworks show downstairs.”
“Is Dad okay?”
Mom frowned. “Let’s just say he’s gone out to think about it.”
“To a bar, you mean?”
Mom shrugged and sat down on Sophie’s bed. “I’m so sorry,” she said. “I feel like this is partially my fault.”
“Why?” Sophie said. “Because Dad made you feel guilty?” “Because I do feel guilty.”
“Why should you feel guilty? I’m the one who blew it.”
“I should’ve talked to you more. I should’ve suspected that something was wrong. I know you’ve been acting differently. But I just figured it was another adolescent thing.”
“Yeah, a pregnant adolescent thing.”
“I assume you decided against an abortion.” Mom looked away as she said this. “I mean, I know about your religious beliefs, and I respect that.”
“I actually went to a family planning clinic to get an abortion.”
“Oh, Sophie. And you didn’t even tell me?”
“I didn’t want anyone to know, Mom. I was too ashamed. I still am.”
“But you decided not to get an abortion.”
“I guess I figured two wrongs couldn’t make a right.”
“Right.” Mom sighed loudly.
“Do you wish I’d gotten an abortion?”
“I don’t know . . . I wish you weren’t pregnant, Sophie. For your own sake.”
“Me too.”
“So what do you plan to do—I mean, when the baby comes?”
“I don’t know.”
Mom just nodded like this wasn’t surprising.
“What do you think I should do?”
“Only you know the answer to that, Sophie.”
“I mean, I will finish school. No doubt about that. I plan to enroll in the pregnancy center at school.”
“Was that why you got so involved in that debate?” Mom said.
“I didn’t know that you knew about—”
“I don’t live under a rock, Sophie. I knew. I just didn’t want to get involved.” She pushed her fingertips against her temples.
“I’m really sorry, Mom.”
“I know you are, sweetie.” Mom put her arms around Sophie. “So am I.”
“Do you forgive me?”
“Of course.” Mom continued to hug her, stroking her hair. “I love you, Sophie. How could I not forgive you?”
“That might not be the case with Dad.”
“He’ll get over it . . . in time.”
“He wouldn’t even look at me.”
“I know.” She sighed.
“I only had sex twice, Mom.” For some reason Sophie wanted to make this perfectly clear. “And I didn’t even like it.”
“Then why did you do it?”
“The guy . . . I thought—I thought I was in love . . . I thought he loved me.” Sophie told her mom all about camp and Dylan and how he’d pulled her in. “It was almost like I was under his spell. I mean, he’d just touch me and say sweet things, and I—I was such a fool.” Sophie was crying again. But her mom continued to hold her, rocking her to and fro as Sophie just sobbed and sobbed.
Finally she quit crying, and she and Mom just sat there looking at each other. “What now?” Sophie asked.
“Dinner.” Mom stood up. “You need to eat properly when you’re pregnant.”
“I’ve been taking prenatal vitamins,” Sophie admitted. “I kept them well hidden in my sock drawer.”
“Have you been to an obstetrician yet?”
“Not yet.”
“Want me to schedule you an appointment with mine? My ob-gyn doctor is nice.”
“Yeah, thanks.”
Sophie and Mom moved quietly through the remainder of the evening. As if on autopilot, they fixed dinner, then sat down to eat. Sophie did not expect to see her dad again that night. She just prayed that he’d get over it . . . eventually.
“You know . . . you’re going to have to tell your brother,” Mom said as they cleaned up the dinner things.
“No.” Sophie put the remainder of green salad in the fridge. “You need to do that. Bart deserves to know what’s going on.”
“In time.”
“There’s no time like the present.” Mom picked up the receiver and handed it to Sophie.
Sophie sighed. “I just don’t think I can do it.”
“Want me to break it to him for you?”
Sophie felt a rush of relief. “Would you? I mean, I’ll talk to him later . . . after he recovers from the shock.”
As Mom started to dial his number, Sophie made a quick getaway. She didn’t even want to hear her