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’s something humorous or questionable about Tobias’ gender and stresses the presumption that Tobias is gay. When Tobias says that he wants to “out that queen” referring to Ann’s competition in an inner beauty pageant, Michael immediately retorts, “I think you just did,” not so subtly implying that Tobias is revealing his inner nature, his homosexual identity.6 This ties into the running gag that Tobias is not only gay, but that he’s in denial about his homosexuality.7 In “Let ‘Em Eat Cake,” Tobias claims to have been walking in an area (one that happens to be a gay district) that he’d never been to before, but the narrator reveals he’d been there several times before. The fact that Tobias openly denies visiting this area hints that he’s hiding his homosexual proclivities from his family.

Tobias and Lindsay are rarely intimate sexually or emotionally. In “The One Where Michael Leaves,” Michael finds out that Lindsay and Tobias have been sleeping in separate beds and suggests that they take the master bed once he leaves. Later in the same episode, Lindsay states that the attempt to revive their sex life was, “to be honest . . . quite awkward” (the scene cuts to Tobias practicing Kegel exercises as preparation). In the episode “Out on a Limb,” when Tobias and Lindsay are intimate in Maggie Lizer’s shower, the first time in the shower since the honeymoon, Tobias proudly exclaims, “and this time, no tears!” Despite these attempts, Lindsay (rather explicitly) tells her lawyer, Bob Loblaw, all of the ways Tobias has failed to satisfy her (“Forget Me Now”). Tobias’s attempts to connect with her on both levels are usually amusingly awkward, lending further support to the hypothesis that Tobias is not sexually attracted to women. A case in point: In preparation for what Tobias calls “a night of heterosexual intercourse,” we see a review of the last attempt, including the following awkward exchange:

Lindsay (affectionately): Oh T, you’re always thinking of others.

Tobias: I tried that, but it didn’t work, either.

Lindsay: Well, maybe I would be more attracted to you if you were in better shape. You know, if you were more muscular and masculine. Does that make me shallow?

Tobias: No. I was going to say the same thing to you. [“Family Ties”]

We also see suggestions of Tobias’s homosexuality in his interactions with other males. Tobias thinks “everyone” is gay, and often labels other men accordingly (like George Michael, Steve Holt (!), and even one of his patients back in Boston).8 Consider the friendship with his gym buddy, Frank, for example. In the episode “Mr. F,” Frank tells Tobias he’s wanted to talk to Tobias about who he is and to discuss taking the relationship to a potentially awkward level. Tobias responds, twirling his hair, “Oh well, I’ve been wanting to have my own awkward talk as well” (and looks down bashfully). When Frank suggests they could be more than gym buddies, Tobias exclaims, “You’re blowing my mind, Frank.” Yet, when Frank reveals he’s an agent who would like to work with Tobias, Tobias looks disappointed and says (unconvincingly), “Oh! That is good news. I’m glad you went first.” Later, in “Family Ties,” when he finds a “woman” to date while in an open relationship with Lindsay, her name is Michael and she happens to be a man. While this suggests homosexuality (or bisexuality), it leaves several questions unanswered: Is Tobias really in denial about his homosexuality? Is Tobias only pretending to others that he thinks Michael is a girl? Or does Tobias really believe that Michael is a girl? The one fact that remains clear is that Tobias doesn’t fit traditional gender norms.

Tobias, the Blow Hard

In addition to Tobias’s behaviors and relationships, he also has the habit of speaking in double entendres. In nearly every episode, Tobias says something that can be interpreted as having not only a sexual meaning but also a specifically homosexual one. In “For British Eyes Only,” Tobias visits a costume shop. The clerk (who is clearly a man in drag) says, “Look who’s back. Are you going