Artemis Fowl_ The Opal Deception - Eoin Colfer [51]
“Hello, Butler,” said Artemis’s voice, or a very sophisticated fake. “If you are watching this, then our good friend Mister Diggums has come through.”
“You hear that?” spat Mulch through a mouthful of bread. “Good friend Mister Diggums.”
“Quiet!”
“Everything you think you know about this planet is about to change,” continued Artemis. “Humans are not the only sentient beings on Earth, in fact we are not even the most technologically advanced. Below the surface are several species of fairy. Most are possibly primates, but I have not had the opportunity to conduct medical examinations as of yet.”
Butler could not hide his impatience. “Please, Artemis. Get to the point.”
“But more of that at another time,” said Artemis, as if he had heard. “There is a possibility that you are watching this at a time of peril, so I must arm you with all the knowledge that we have gathered during our adventures with the Lower Elements Police.”
Lower Elements Police? thought Butler. This is all a fake. Somehow it’s fake.
Again, the video-Artemis seemed to read his thoughts. “In order to verify the fantastical facts that I am about to reveal, I will say one word. Just one. A word that I could not possibly know unless you had told me. Something you said as you lay dying, before Holly Short cured you with her magic. What would you tell me if you lay dying, old friend. What would be the single word you would say?”
I would tell you my first name, thought Butler. Something only two other people in the world know. Something completely forbidden by bodyguard etiquette, unless it is too late to matter.
Artemis leaned in to the camera. “Your name, my old friend, is Domovoi.”
Butler was reeling. Oh my God, he thought. It’s true, it’s all true.
Something began to happen in his brain. Disjointed images flashed through his subconscious, releasing repressed memories. The false past was swept away by blinding truth. An electric connect-the-dots jolted through his cranium, making everything clear. It all made sense now. He felt old because the healing had aged him. He found it difficult to breath sometimes because Kevlar strands had been woven into the skin over his chest wound. He remembered Holly’s kidnapping, and the B’wa Kell goblin revolution. He remembered Holly and Julius, the centaur Foaly, and of course, Mulch Diggums. There was no need to read the other files; one word had been enough. He remembered everything.
Butler studied the dwarf with fresh eyes. Everything was so familiar now. The vibrating frizz of hair, the bowlegged stance, the smell. He sprang from his chair and strode across the room to Mulch, who was busy raiding the study’s minifridge.
“Mulch, you old reprobate. Good to see you.”
“Now he remembers,” said the dwarf without turning around. “Do you have anything to say?”
Butler glanced at the open bum-flap. “Yes. Don’t point that thing at me. I’ve seen the damage it can do.”
The bodyguard’s smile froze on his face as he remembered one detail of Artemis’s phone message.
“Julius Root. I heard something about a bomb.”
Mulch turned from the fridge, his beard laced with a cocktail of dairy products.
“Yes. Julius is gone. I can’t believe it. He’s been chasing me for so many years.”
Butler felt a terrific weariness weigh on his shoulders. He had lost too many comrades over the years.
“And what’s more,” continued Mulch. “Holly is accused of murdering him.”
“That’s just not possible. We have to find them.”
“Now you’re talking,” said the dwarf, slamming the fridge door. “Do you have a plan?”
“Yes. Find Holly and Artemis.”
Mulch rolled his eyes. “Pure genius. It’s a wonder you need Artemis at all.”
Now that the dwarf had eaten his fill, the two reacquainted friends sat at the conference table and brought each other up to speed.
Butler cleaned his gun as he spoke. He often did this in times of stress. It was a comfort thing.
“So, Opal Koboi somehow gets out of prison and hatches this complicated plot to revenge herself