Artemis Fowl_ The Opal Deception - Eoin Colfer [54]
“Very good, Mud Boy. A rather tiny artificial human pituitary gland. HGH is one of seven hormones secreted by the pituitary.”
“HGH?” interrupted Holly.
“Human growth hormone,” explained Artemis.
“Exactly. As the name implies, HGH enhances the growth of various organs and tissues, especially muscle and bone. In three months, I have already grown half an inch. Oh, maybe I’ll never make the basketball team, but no one will ever believe that I am a fairy.”
“You’re no fairy,” said Holly bitterly. “At heart you’ve always been human.”
“That’s supposed to be an insult, I suppose. Maybe I deserve that, considering what I am about to do to you. In an hour’s time, there won’t be enough of you two remaining to fill the booty box.”
This was a term that Artemis had not heard before. “Booty box? That sounds like a pirate expression.”
Opal opened a secret panel in the flooring, revealing a small compartment underneath. “This is a booty box. The term was coined by vegetable smugglers more than eight thousand years ago. A secret compartment that would go unnoticed by customs officials. Of course, these days, with X-ray, infrared, and motion-sensitive cameras, a booty box isn’t much good.” Opal smiled slyly, like a child who has put one over on her teacher. “Unless of course the box is completely constructed from stealth ore, refrigerated, and has internal projectors to fool X-ray and infrared. The only way to detect this booty box is to put your foot into it. So, even if the LEP did board my shuttle, they would not find whatever it is I am choosing to smuggle. Which in this case is a jar of chocolate truffles. Hardly illegal, but the cooler is full. Chocolate truffles are my passion, you know. All that time I was away, truffles were one of two things I craved. The other was revenge.”
Artemis yawned. “How fascinating. A secret compartment. What a genius you are. How can you fail to take over the world with a booty box full of truffles?”
Opal smoothed Artemis’s hair back from his forehead. “Make all the jokes you want, Mud Boy. Words are all you have now.”
Minutes later, Merv brought the stealth shuttle in to land. Artemis and Holly were cuffed and led down the retractable gangplank. They emerged into a giant tunnel dimly illuminated by Glo-Strips. Most of the lighting panels were shattered, the rest were on their last legs. This section of the chute had once been part of a thriving metropolis, but now was completely deserted and derelict. Demolition notices were pasted across various drooping billboards.
Opal pointed to one. “This whole place is being torn down in a month. We just made the deadline.”
“Lucky us,” muttered Holly.
Merv and Scant prodded them wordlessly along the chute with their gun barrels. The road surface beneath their feet was buckled and cracked. Swear toads clustered in damp patches, spouting obscenities. The roadside was lined with abandoned concession stands and souvenir shops. In one window, human dolls were arranged in various warlike poses.
Artemis stopped in spite of the gun at his back. “Is that how you see us?” he asked.
“Oh, no,” said Opal. “You’re much worse than that, but the manufacturers don’t want to scare the children.”
Several huge hemispherical structures squatted at the end of the tunnel. Each one the size of a football stadium. They were constructed of hexagonal panels welded together along the seams. Some panels were opaque, others were transparent. Each panel was roughly the dimensions of a small house.
Before the hemispheres was a huge arch, with strips of tattered gold leaf hanging from its frame. A sign hung from the arch, emblazoned with six-foot-high Gnommish letters.
“The Eleven Wonders of the Human World,” declared Opal theatrically. “Ten thousand years of civilization, and you only manage to produce eleven so-called wonders.”
Artemis tested his cuffs. They were tightly fastened. “You know of course that there are only seven wonders on the official list.”
“I know that,” said Opal testily. “But humans are so narrow-minded. Fairy scholars studied video footage and decided to