At First Sight - Nicholas Sparks [94]
“What about a C-section?” Jeremy asked.
The doctor nodded, as if he’d anticipated the question. “We could, but C-sections come with their own risks. It’s major surgery, and even though the baby is viable, she would be at risk for other problems. Considering that the band hasn’t attached and the baby’s doing fine, I think that would actually entail more risk for both Lexie and the baby. But we’ll keep that possibility open, okay? Let’s just keep going like we are for the time being.”
Jeremy nodded, unable to speak. Four weeks to go.
Jeremy held Lexie’s hand on the way back to the car; once inside, he saw the same concern on her face that he felt himself. They heard the baby was fine, but the news was a whisper compared with the deafening announcement that a C-section was out for the time being and that the band seemed to be growing. Even if the doctor wasn’t sure.
Lexie turned toward him, her lips pressed together, looking suddenly tired. “Let’s go home,” she said. Her hands rested instinctively on her belly, and her face was flushed.
“You sure?”
“Yeah,” she said.
He was just about to start the engine when he saw her lower her head into her hands. “I hate this! I hate that just when you allow yourself to believe that everything’s going to be okay, even for an instant, you find out that we were just being set up for something worse. I’m just so sick of this!”
I am, too, Jeremy wanted to say. “I know you are,” he said soothingly. There was nothing else he could say; what he wanted was to somehow make the situation better, to fix it. What she wanted, he recognized, was for someone simply to listen.
“I’m sorry,” she said. “I know this is just as hard on you as it’s been on me. And I know you’re just as worried. It’s just that you seem so much better able to handle it than I am.”
Despite it all, he laughed. “I doubt it. My stomach started doing flip-flops the instant the doctor walked in the room. I’m developing an aversion to doctors. They give me the heebie-jeebies. Whatever happens, Claire can’t become a doctor. I’m going to have to put my foot down there.”
“How can you joke at a time like this?”
“It’s how I deal with stress.”
She smiled. “You could throw a temper tantrum.”
“I don’t think so. That’s more your style.”
“I’ve been doing that enough for the both of us. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry. And besides, it was kind of good news. So far, so good. That’s what we were hoping for.”
She reached for his hand. “You ready to go home?”
“Yeah,” he said. “And let me tell you, I’m really looking forward to an apple juice on the rocks to steady the nerves.”
“No, you have a beer. I’ll have the apple juice and look on enviously.”
“Hey,” Lexie said the following week.
They’d just finished dinner, and Jeremy had gone into his office. He was sitting at the desk, staring at the computer screen. When he heard Lexie’s voice, he turned to see her standing in the doorway, thinking again that despite the bulging belly, she was the most gorgeous woman he’d ever seen.
“How are you?”
“I’m fine. But I just thought I’d check to see how it’s coming.”
Since their marriage, he’d been telling her exactly what had been happening with his writing, but only when she asked. There was no use volunteering his own daily struggles when she got home from work. How many times could a person hear that her spouse is failing before she finally began to believe that he was a failure? Instead, he’d taken to retreating into his office, as if hoping for divine intervention and attempting to make the impossible possible.
“The same,” he said, simultaneously evasive and descriptive. With his answer, he thought she might nod and turn to leave; that had been her response in the last couple of months, once she learned he’d already postponed his last two columns. Instead, she stepped into the room.
“Would you like some company?”
“I always love company,” he said. “Especially when nothing seems to be working.”
“Tough day?”
“Like I said, the same as always.”
She entered his office, but instead of moving toward the chair in the corner, she walked toward