Atlas Shrugged [713]
"I don't have to tell you," he said, "that if I do it, it won't be an act of self-sacrifice. I do not care to live on their terms, I do not care to obey them and I do not care to see you enduring a drawn-out murder.
There will be no values for me to seek after that - and I do not care to exist without values. I don't have to tell you that we owe no morality to those who hold us under a gun. So use every power of deceit you can command, but convince them that you hate me. Then we'll have a chance to remain alive and to escape - I don't know when or how, but I'll know that I'm free to act. Is this understood?"
She forced herself to lift her head, to look straight at him and to nod.
"When they come," he said, "tell them that you had been trying to find me for them, that you became suspicious when you saw my name on your payroll list and that you came here to investigate."
She nodded.
"I will stall about admitting my identity - they might recognize my voice, but I'll attempt to deny it - so that it will be you who'll tell them that I am the John Galt they're seeking."
It took her a few seconds longer, but she nodded, "Afterwards, you'll claim - and accept - that five-hundred-thousand dollar reward they've offered for my capture."
She closed her eyes, then nodded.
"Dagny," he said slowly, "there is no way to serve your own values under their system. Sooner or later, whether you intended it or not, they had to bring you to the point where the only thing you can do for me is to turn against me. Gather your strength and do it - then we'll earn this one half-hour and, perhaps, the future."
I'll do it," she said firmly, and added, "if that is what happens, if "It will happen. Don't regret it. I won't. You haven't seen the nature of our enemies. You'll see it now. If I have to be the pawn in the demonstration that will convince you, I'm willing to be-and to win you from them, once and for all. You didn't want to wait any longer?
Oh, Dagny, Dagny, neither did I!"
It was the way he held her, the way he kissed her mouth that made her feel as if every step she had taken, every danger, every doubt, even her treason against him, if it was treason, all of it were giving her an exultant right to this moment. He saw the struggle in her face, the tension of an incredulous protest against herself-and she heard the sound of his voice through the strands of her hair pressed to his lips: "Don't think of them now. Never think of pain or danger or enemies a moment longer than is necessary to fight them. You're here.
It's our time and our life, not theirs. Don't struggle not to be happy.
You are."
"At the risk of destroying you?" she whispered.
"You won't. But-yes, even that. You don't think it's indifference, do you? Was it indifference that broke you and brought you here?"
"I-" And then the violence of the truth made her pull his mouth down to hers, then throw the words at his face: "I didn't care whether either one of us lived afterwards, just to see you this once!"
"I would have been disappointed if you hadn't come."
"Do you know what it was like, waiting, fighting it, delaying it one more day, then one more, then-"
He chuckled. "Do I?" he said softly.
Her hand dropped in a helpless gesture: she thought of his ten years. "When I heard your voice on the radio," she said, "when I heard the greatest statement I ever . . . No, I have no right to tell you what I thought of it,"
"Why not?"
"You think that I haven't accepted it."
"You will."
"Were you speaking from here?"
"No, from the valley."
"And then you returned to New York?"
"The next morning."
"And you've been here ever since?"
"Yes."
"Have you heard the kind of appeals they're sending out to you every night?"
"Sure."
She glanced