Bachelor Unleashed - Brenda Jackson [47]
He held her gaze. “Because I told you what I wanted.”
“For us to pick up where we left off?”
“Yes, and continue from there without any limitations, Farrah.”
She shook her head. “That’s not going to work, Xavier. That’s why I thought it was best if we ended things six months ago.”
“Whatever hang-ups there were, Farrah, were yours, not mine. The only reason I gave into it at the time was because I convinced myself that perhaps you were right. After last night I decided you’re dead wrong.”
The flaring of fire in her eyes let him know she hadn’t appreciated what he’d just said. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to know he’d pushed the wrong button, but at the moment he really didn’t give a damn. It was time they had it out. He refused to go through another long spell without her.
She leaned forward in her seat. “This new attitude of yours is all because of last night? One good blow job got you all up in arms? Got you refusing a holiday fling with me because you want more than that?”
He slid out the chair to stand on his feet. “It’s more than that, Farrah, and you know it. It’s about the chemistry we stir whenever we’re together. I see nothing wrong with wanting more. But after almost a year, you decided we should end things. Why? Because you had begun feeling something a lot deeper and more solid than mere orgasms.”
“That’s not true!” she said adamantly.
“Isn’t it?”
“It was just sex, Xavier. You could have gotten the same from any woman.”
“Hardly, which is why I haven’t slept with another woman since you. And probably why you haven’t, by your admission, been intimate with anyone since me.”
He thought he’d hit a nerve, and she proved him right when she began pacing angrily. He decided to sit back in the chair and let her blow off steam, come to terms with being called out. Except he was getting more turned on by the second watching her, seeing how the hair was flying around her face with every livid step she took in boots that were definitely made for more than walking.
Her hips were not just swaying now, they were being brandished about under the sting of rejection. Something she evidently didn’t care much for. Not for the first time, he noticed just how small her waist was, and how her hips flared out in an almost perfect womanly shape. And her breasts—heaven help him, they were the most luscious pair on any woman—were straining against the bodice of her dress.
While his gaze roamed all over her, she finally came to a stop mere inches from where he sat. She placed her hands on her hips. “So, what exactly is it that you want?”
He smiled and leaned forward in his chair and met her gaze without wavering. He fought the urge to tell her that what he wanted was marriage, until death do them part. Considering everything, he figured now was not a good time to share that with her.
“What I want is for us to resume our affair without limitations. That means we go for as long as we’re mutually satisfied.”
She rolled her eyes. “People only do long-term affairs when they want to get serious eventually. People who want more out of a relationship. People who might even contemplate marriage.”
“Not necessarily. I think we know each other’s position on marriage, so we don’t have to worry about us wanting anything that serious. However, I’m at a point in my life where I prefer long-term exclusiveness. Not only do I want a satisfying bed partner, I also want to be with someone I can take out to dinner on occasion, to a movie, to those business functions that I’m oftentimes invited to attend. I don’t like women coming on to me anymore. I want to emit an air that I’m taken…even if I’m truly not.”
He paused, wanting her to digest what he’d just said. Then he continued. “You enjoy my company and I enjoy yours. I see no reason why we can’t continue what we had unless…”
She tilted her head and looked at him, lifting a brow. “Unless what?”
“Unless you’re afraid of falling in love with me.”
He eased up from his seat, ignoring the burst of longing and love he felt for the woman standing