Beautiful Joe [109]
led him squealing
off the stage. The gander followed, gabbling as fast as he could, and there was
a regular roar of applause.
"After that, there were ladders brought in, Joe, and dogs came on; not
thoroughbreds, but curs something like you. The Italian says he can't teach
tricks to pedigree animals as well as to scrubs. Those dogs jumped the ladders,
and climbed them, and went through them, and did all kinds of things. The man
cracked his whip once, and they began; twice, and they did backward what they
had done forward; three times, and they stopped, and every animal, dogs, goats,
ponies, and monkeys, after they had finished their tricks, ran up to their
master, and he gave them a lump of sugar. They seemed fond of him, and often
when they weren't performing went up to him, and licked his hands or his sleeve.
There was one boss dog, Joe, with a head like yours. Bob, they called him, and
he did all his tricks alone. The Italian went off the stage, and the dog came on
and made his bow, and climbed his ladders, and jumped his hurdles, and went off
again. The audience howled for an encore, and didn't he come out alone, make
another bow, and retire. I saw old Judge Brown wiping the tears from his eyes,
he'd laughed so much. One of the last tricks was with a goat, and the Italian
said it was the best of all, because the goat is such a hard animal to teach. He
had a big ball, and the goat got on it and rolled it across the stage without
getting off. He looked as nervous as a cat, shaking his old beard, and trying to
keep his four hoofs close enough together to keep him on the ball.
"We had a funny little play at the end of the performance. A monkey dressed as a
lady in a white satin suit and a bonnet with a white veil, came on the stage.
She was Miss Green and the dog Bob was going to elope with her. He was all
rigged out as Mr. Smith, and had on a light suit of clothes, and a tall hat on
the side of his head, high collar, long cuffs, and he carried a cane. He was a
regular dude. He stepped up to Miss Green on his hind legs, and helped her on to
a pony's back. The pony galloped off the stage; then a crowd of monkeys,
chattering and wringing their hands, came on. Mr. Smith had run away with their
child. They were all dressed up, too. There were the father and mother, with
gray wigs and black clothes, and the young Greens in bibs and tuckers. They were
a queer-looking crowd. While they were going on in this way, the pony trotted
back on the stage; and they all flew at him and pulled off their daughter from
his back, and laughed and chattered, and boxed her ears, and took off her white
veil and her satin dress, and put on an old brown thing, and some of them seized
the dog, and kicked his hat, and broke his cane, and stripped his clothes off,
and threw them in a corner, and bound his legs with cords. A goat came on,
harnessed to a little cart and they threw the dog in it, and wheeled him around
the stage a few times. Then they took him out and tied him to a hook in the
wall, and the goat ran off the stage, and the monkeys ran to one side, and one
of them pulled out a little revolver, pointed it at the dog, fired, and he
dropped down as if he was dead.
"The monkeys stood looking at him, and then there was the most awful hullabaloo
you ever beard. Such a barking and yelping, and half a dozen dogs rushed on the
stage, and didn't they trundle those monkeys about. They nosed them, and pushed
them, and shook them, till they all ran away, all but Miss Green, who sat
shivering in a corner. After a while, she crept up to the dead dog, pawed him a
little, and didn't he jump up as much alive as any of them? Everybody in the
room clapped and shouted, and then the curtain dropped, and the thing was over.
I wish he'd give another performance. Early in thc morning he has to go to
Boston."
Jack pushed my paws from his knees and went outdoors, and I began to think that
I would very much like to see those performing animals. It was not yet
off the stage. The gander followed, gabbling as fast as he could, and there was
a regular roar of applause.
"After that, there were ladders brought in, Joe, and dogs came on; not
thoroughbreds, but curs something like you. The Italian says he can't teach
tricks to pedigree animals as well as to scrubs. Those dogs jumped the ladders,
and climbed them, and went through them, and did all kinds of things. The man
cracked his whip once, and they began; twice, and they did backward what they
had done forward; three times, and they stopped, and every animal, dogs, goats,
ponies, and monkeys, after they had finished their tricks, ran up to their
master, and he gave them a lump of sugar. They seemed fond of him, and often
when they weren't performing went up to him, and licked his hands or his sleeve.
There was one boss dog, Joe, with a head like yours. Bob, they called him, and
he did all his tricks alone. The Italian went off the stage, and the dog came on
and made his bow, and climbed his ladders, and jumped his hurdles, and went off
again. The audience howled for an encore, and didn't he come out alone, make
another bow, and retire. I saw old Judge Brown wiping the tears from his eyes,
he'd laughed so much. One of the last tricks was with a goat, and the Italian
said it was the best of all, because the goat is such a hard animal to teach. He
had a big ball, and the goat got on it and rolled it across the stage without
getting off. He looked as nervous as a cat, shaking his old beard, and trying to
keep his four hoofs close enough together to keep him on the ball.
"We had a funny little play at the end of the performance. A monkey dressed as a
lady in a white satin suit and a bonnet with a white veil, came on the stage.
She was Miss Green and the dog Bob was going to elope with her. He was all
rigged out as Mr. Smith, and had on a light suit of clothes, and a tall hat on
the side of his head, high collar, long cuffs, and he carried a cane. He was a
regular dude. He stepped up to Miss Green on his hind legs, and helped her on to
a pony's back. The pony galloped off the stage; then a crowd of monkeys,
chattering and wringing their hands, came on. Mr. Smith had run away with their
child. They were all dressed up, too. There were the father and mother, with
gray wigs and black clothes, and the young Greens in bibs and tuckers. They were
a queer-looking crowd. While they were going on in this way, the pony trotted
back on the stage; and they all flew at him and pulled off their daughter from
his back, and laughed and chattered, and boxed her ears, and took off her white
veil and her satin dress, and put on an old brown thing, and some of them seized
the dog, and kicked his hat, and broke his cane, and stripped his clothes off,
and threw them in a corner, and bound his legs with cords. A goat came on,
harnessed to a little cart and they threw the dog in it, and wheeled him around
the stage a few times. Then they took him out and tied him to a hook in the
wall, and the goat ran off the stage, and the monkeys ran to one side, and one
of them pulled out a little revolver, pointed it at the dog, fired, and he
dropped down as if he was dead.
"The monkeys stood looking at him, and then there was the most awful hullabaloo
you ever beard. Such a barking and yelping, and half a dozen dogs rushed on the
stage, and didn't they trundle those monkeys about. They nosed them, and pushed
them, and shook them, till they all ran away, all but Miss Green, who sat
shivering in a corner. After a while, she crept up to the dead dog, pawed him a
little, and didn't he jump up as much alive as any of them? Everybody in the
room clapped and shouted, and then the curtain dropped, and the thing was over.
I wish he'd give another performance. Early in thc morning he has to go to
Boston."
Jack pushed my paws from his knees and went outdoors, and I began to think that
I would very much like to see those performing animals. It was not yet