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Being Kendra_ Cribs, Cocktails, and Getting My Sexy Back - Kendra Wilkinson [0]

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Being Kendra


Cribs, Cocktails & Getting My Sexy Back

KENDRA WILKINSON

WITH JARED SHAPIRO

Dedication


I’D LIKE TO DEDICATE THIS BOOK

TO THE TWO MOST IMPORTANT MEN IN MY LIFE:

MY HUSBAND, HANK III, AND SON, HANK IV.

I LOVE YOU BOTH, AND THANK YOU FOR INSPIRING ME EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE.

Contents

Cover

Title Page

Dedication

Introduction

Chapter 1 - Motherhood 2.0: The Plight of the Modern-Day Mom

Chapter 2 - Lights, Camera, Diaper Change

Chapter 3 - I Eat Breakfast in the Shower

Chapter 4 - Seven to Seven, Seven Days a Week

Chapter 5 - No, Mommy and Daddy Are Not Getting a Divorce

Chapter 6 - Meltdown in Minnesota

Chapter 7 - Full-Body Blues

Chapter 8 - Getting Back to Kendra

Chapter 9 - Fast Food and Fast Sex

Chapter 10 - The Birds and the Bees

Chapter 11 - Marriage Is My Day Job

Chapter 12 - Mama’s Big Night Out

Chapter 13 - Wine, Oysters, and Sex in the Backseat

Chapter 14 - The Dance of a Lifetime

Chapter 15 - Kendra the Show

Chapter 16 - Mommy Issues

Chapter 17 - Parentnoia

Chapter 18 - Keeping It All Together

Afterword

Acknowledgments

Photo Insert

About the Authors

Also by Kendra Wilkinson

Credits

Copyright

About the Publisher

Introduction

Hank and I had sex on the staircase today. Right there, flat-out spontaneous sex with our clothes mostly still on. Steps digging into my back, the banister acting as a bedpost. It was quick and skillful. I don’t buy into that whole belief that married couples don’t have sex. Because today was proof that Hank and I still do!

Of course, it wasn’t exactly a stairway to heaven . . .

See, as parents now we have to try to fit in sex whenever we can. This wasn’t a passionate act of sex where we ripped off our clothes and couldn’t wait until we got to the bedroom. I was not a rock star Playboy Bunny getting it on with a stud NFL player. There was no trail of clothes—bra, shoes, socks, and panties—littering the hallway and leading all the way up to our bed. On the contrary, we actually went to the staircase on purpose and hurried through sex. Why the staircase? Hank and I both wanted to have sex, but we weren’t alone in our house, as usual. My assistant, Eddie, was there working, so we sent him to the store to get a toilet plunger (we didn’t really need one, we just wanted him out of the house). And the staircase just happens to give us a great view of the driveway so we could see Eddie’s car pull up. So we did our deed fast and quietly, of course, since baby Hank was upstairs napping. Sure enough, ten minutes later Eddie was back.

In a nutshell, that’s my new sex life as a mom. But I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

Being on a reality show, I’ve got people coming in and out of my house at all hours of the day. Sometimes they’re holding a camera, a set of lights, a microphone, a rack of size zero (finally!) clothes, or even a toilet plunger, but it’s like a revolving door. My life is just one giant production schedule. I may be the boss, I may make a nice living, but I have zero control and have to bust my butt to get it all done by sundown. I’ve learned how to multitask with the best of ’em. Sometimes when I’m doing radio interviews on the phone from home, I’ll press the “mute” button so I can pee. When you gotta go, you gotta go! There are sandwiches to be made, diapers to be changed, and pacifiers to be found (where the hell do they all go?).

My life has been a wild ride: from a stripper to a Playboy girlfriend to a pregnant bride to a mom with milk leaking through her tank top. And every day I wake up thankful to be where I am: in my new house. Of course, it wasn’t always that way. I had hit bottom when I was younger and into drugs, but I clawed my way out. I took chances and found a path that worked for me—and landed me in some pretty interesting territory. Since I’ve already had my “bottom-out” experience, I knew it could only get better. And it did—a whole lot better.

The truth is, if I wasn’t on my reality show, there’s a good chance I’d probably be stripping. I had very little growing up and struggled for money

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