Being Kendra_ Cribs, Cocktails, and Getting My Sexy Back - Kendra Wilkinson [88]
I felt bad because I was basically implying that I didn’t trust Hank, which isn’t true. I completely trust him. Hank replied, “Well, what about me? You don’t trust me? You don’t want people in the house because you don’t trust what could happen?” Infidelity and cheating is not a fun thing to talk about for a married couple. But I think it’s important and I like to get it all out in the open and reassure myself. It’s not that I’m accusing him of anything or that I’m admitting to anything. On the contrary, I just want to make sure we talk about it. It’s dominating the entertainment world right now, couples splitting, families getting ripped apart, cheating scandals, so I just want to make sure we talk about how that makes us feel and our relationship. I don’t want to ignore it. I always ask Hank why these men can’t just divorce their wives. I don’t understand why it’s so important to stay in your marriage while fucking your housekeeper or the nanny.
When kids are involved that’s when I get pissed off. Those children now have a tarnished image of what marriage should be, but even worse, who their father is.
It sucks for the good guys like Hank. They never get shown in the limelight; only the bad guys get reported on. Right now because of guys like Arnold and Tiger, every good man is being questioned. Hank says the most beautiful things to me and treats me like a princess. And while I’m not questioning him, it’s very possible that what he says to me and does for me was said and done by Arnold to Maria. Someone like Tiger Woods, who we thought was the iconic good guy and family man, probably said the exact same thing that every good guy says to his wife.
What Hank and I ultimately came to understand from the Arnold conversation is that you can’t control what another person is going to do. Maybe they don’t get the sex they want, maybe they have a fetish—they’re into housekeepers or tattoos or prostitutes. When that fetish hits you’re not going to be able to control it. That one split second that the guy (or woman for that matter) acts upon it, it’s over. Because it’s something deeper than that one second. Yes, they are acting on it then, but they’ve obviously got it in their head that they need to do this, and you can’t stop that.
Thank God my husband’s fetish is me. I’m not being cocky about it, I just know it. I text him hot and sexy pictures of me all the time and he gets so worked up over it. I want to be the French maid for him, the stripper, the tattooed girl. Whatever he wants, I want to be his fetish. And I don’t do it so that I can keep him satisfied in order to prevent him from cheating. I do it because I genuinely love him and want to have fun with him.
Hank’s gone a lot for football, sometimes weeks or months at a time. So we are separated for extended periods, and it’s not easy. Crazy things happen when husbands and wives are away from each other. Everyone’s heard the horror stories of what happens on movie sets between costars. But I won’t let it happen. I constantly remind him of what he has at home. And I do that with video Skype.
We never plan our Skype sex sessions; it’s always spontaneous. When Hank’s away he’ll be working out all day or playing football or hurt or tired, or maybe I spent all day taking care of the baby, so we just never know if we’re going to both be in the mood. So our intentions are usually just to chat, but with us you never know where it might lead. Talking turns into flirting, which can turn into a little striptease, and then there’s a spark and bam! All clothes are off.
Skype sex is like a fantasy, in a way. I love looking at my screen and seeing my husband but getting the chance to pretend whatever I want. For Hank, it’s like watching porn, starring me!
I try to surprise Hank and keep him guessing. Sometimes Hank will log