Belle - Lesley Pearse [219]
She waved until he was just a dot in the distance, and only then was she ready to join Noah.
He had found an empty compartment. As she came through the door he laughingly said how he had strewn their belongings around to deter anyone from joining them. But then he noticed she was crying and handed her his handkerchief.
Belle mopped her eyes and wiped specks of soot from her cheeks. ‘Putting my head out of the window always makes my eyes water,’ she said by way of an explanation.
‘My eyes water at odd times too, especially saying goodbye to people I like,’ Noah said with a wry smile.
It took every ounce of determination Belle had not to break down and tell Noah she loved Etienne and she didn’t think she could bear to go back to London. But Noah was full of excitement at the family reunion ahead of them. It wasn’t fair to make him disappointed or worried, not after the lengths he’d gone to to find her. And it would be cruel to Annie, Mog and Jimmy who were probably frantically preparing for her joyful return.
There was Gabrielle too. She had seen how much the older woman cared for her this morning when they said their goodbyes, and she had such high hopes for Belle’s future back in England.
Belle owed her so much; in fact, but for Gabrielle’s actions her body might have been hauled out of the Seine or lain in a shallow grave for all eternity. Yet it wasn’t just gratitude she felt towards this woman who said so little but had done so much for her. Gabrielle had shown her that it was possible for even the most damaged people to start a new and better life. She told Belle about her time as a whore, about the man cutting her throat and Lisette taking care of her and young Henri. She’d had heartbreak too when the artist she loved died; she said she would have taken her own life too if she hadn’t had Henri to care for.
‘Maybe we will never meet again,’ she said as she embraced Belle. ‘You will always be welcome here of course, but I understand there may be too many bad memories for you to return. But take away in your heart my affection for you, and my hopes that your dreams will come true. You did more for me than you’ll ever know.’
There was no way Belle could turn back now as the train was picking up speed. So she sat down and focused her attention on Noah to prevent herself thinking of Etienne’s tears.
‘Is Lisette going to come to England?’ she asked. Noah had met up with her twice in the past week but he hadn’t said anything much about the meetings.
‘She said she wanted to, but it may prove too daunting for her.’
‘That’s because she may not think you are entirely serious,’ Belle said. ‘A woman with a child needs to feel secure. You must make her feel that way by bombarding her with letters telling her all the best things about London. Promise her that she’s under no obligation to you, yet say you are looking forward to getting to know her son. That should do it.’
Noah smiled. ‘You make it sound so easy. But we had so little time together for me to show her that I am dependable and not a rake.’
‘She would be able to see that just by looking at you,’ Belle said. She had come to look upon Noah as a brother; she liked his openness and enthusiasm, and the way there was nothing hidden or complicated with him. ‘And she’ll have me nearby to tell her about women’s stuff and for her to confide in. Then there’s Mog – she’s going to welcome her with open arms for being so kind to me.’
‘And what about you and Jimmy?’ Noah asked pointedly. ‘That telegram he sent sounded like he was counting the minutes till he saw you.’
Belle winced. She too had sensed that Jimmy was expecting a great deal, and in the light of how she felt about Etienne, that was a huge worry. ‘You must promise me you won’t say much about Etienne to him. Let me find a way to let him down gently.’
‘Give him a chance,’ Noah said pleadingly. ‘As I see it, Etienne is like a tiger; he’s strong,