Best Friends Forever - Irene S. Levine [104]
Thanking an editor is usually a gratuitous afterthought. For this book, it deserves to come first. Few authors are fortunate enough to be approached by a warm and wonderful editor with an idea for a book that is perfectly suited to their background and interests. I am extremely appreciative of Juliet Grames of The Overlook Press, who commissioned this book and shepherded it through publication. With more than 800 Facebook friends—and still counting—Juliet’s stories and insights about friendship have been invaluable in shaping my thinking about this complex topic. I’m also grateful for the wisdom, guidance, and support that my agent, Joelle Delbourgo, brought to this project.
While I conducted research for this book, it was a particular privilege to draw upon the collective wisdom of other authors and academics who had tackled the subject of female friendship before I did. Although friendship is a subject of universal and perennial interest, I hope this book offers a fresh perspective that dispels the myths that still remain pervasive.
I am indebted to more than 1500 women who responded enthusiastically and in record speed to the online Fractured Friendship Survey and who emailed me or posted messages on my blog (www.fracturedfriendships.com). They shared their stories of bonding, betrayal, and loss with great candor. Many said that just thinking about their friendships and writing about them on paper was an empowering exercise. It was the same for me. I hope this book sheds some light on the fragility of these relationships and their need for nurturance.
Throughout the years, I’ve always been blessed to find new friends—usually because we were in the same place at the same time (whether it was at Bayside High School, Queens College, or St. John’s University; in my neighborhoods in Bayside, Rockville, or Chappaqua; or at brick-and-mortar or virtual workplaces). Irrespective of the circumstances that brought us together, these friendships have helped shape the person I am. My girlfriends have mentored me on how to be a better wife, mother, daughter, teacher, psychologist, writer, and friend. Thank you Judy Buckner, Donna Dellaero, Vikki DeMeo, Rita Dunn, Pam Foti, Risa Fox, Echo Garrett, Gale Germain, Margie Goldstein, Mickey Goodman, Loretta Haggard, Leslie Knowlton, Judy Kirkwood, Judy Kramer, Linda Ligenza, Dawn Jahn Moses, Hilary Nagel, Linda Rosenberg, Diana Silberman, Elissa Steiner, and Diana Zuckerman.
I’m also very lucky to have two wonderful men in my life: my husband, Jerry, and my son, Andrew. Both have been ongoing sources of strength, joy, and pride, and this book would not have been possible without their support. They are my most critical editors as well as my biggest cheerleaders in boxer shorts. When I ask one or both of them to read what I’ve written, however boring the topic might be, they rarely turn me down, whatever the hour. Java, my loyal Himalayan, has also been by my side, making an inherently lonely process more bearable.
As I put away all the books and papers related to this project and come up for air, I am selfishly committed to set aside more time for the friends and family who sustain me.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Irene S. Levine, Ph.D., is a psychologist and award-winning freelance journalist and author. As the Friendship Doctor, she is a regular contributor to the The Huffington Post. She also has a popular blog about female friendships (www.thefriendshipblog.com) and pens an online bi-monthly career column for the American Association for the Advancement of Science. She has written on a range of topics, including health, mental health, relationships, and lifestyles, for leading publications including Ladies’ Home Journal, Reader’s Digest, Self, AARP, Better Homes & Gardens, Health, Prevention, The New York Times, The Los Angeles Times, Chicago Tribune, and The Dallas Morning News. Dr. Levine spent the major portion of her career in senior policy roles at the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) and the Center for Mental Health Services (CMHS), where she was one of the chief