Between Sisters - Kristin Hannah [133]
“I'm sorry.” She touched him. “I've always been as sensitive as a serial killer.”
He sighed. “No, I'm sorry. I needed someone to yell at.”
“I'll always give you a reason, don't worry.”
He smiled, but it was tired and worn. “I'm just . . . scared shitless, that's all. And I don't want her to know.”
“I know.” Meghann smiled up at him. Her sister was lucky to be loved by such a man. For no apparent reason, that made her think of Joe, of the day she'd found him weeping over his divorce. Joe was the kind of man who knew how to love, too. “You're a good man, Bobby Jack Tom Dick. I was wrong about you.”
He laughed. “And you're not half the bitch I thought you were.”
Meghann slipped an arm around him. “I'm going to pretend that was a compliment.”
“It was.”
“Good. Now let's go make Claire smile.”
The days passed slowly; each new morning found Claire a little more tired than the night before. She strove to keep a positive attitude but her health was deteriorating rapidly. She visualized rays of sunlight instead of radiation. She meditated for an hour a day, imagined herself in a beautiful forest or seated beside her beloved river. She ate the macrobiotic diet that Meghann swore would help heal her body.
The Bluesers came down often, separately and together, doing their best to keep Claire's spirits up. Meg's friend Elizabeth had even come for a few days, and the visit helped her sister immensely. The hardest times were weekends, when they went to Hayden; Claire tried to pretend that everything was okay for Ali.
In the evenings, though, it was just the three of them—Claire, Meg, and Bobby—in that too-quiet apartment. Mostly, they watched movies together. At first, when Bobby arrived, they'd tried to spend the evening talking or playing cards, but that had proved difficult. Too many dangerous subjects. None of them could mention the future without flinching, without thinking, Will there be a Christmas together? A Thanksgiving? A next summer?? So, by tacit agreement, they'd let the television become their nighttime soundtrack. Claire was grateful; it gave her several hours where she could sit quietly, without having to pretend.
Finally, the radiation ended.
The following morning Claire got up early. She dressed and showered and drank her coffee out on the deck overlooking the Sound. It amazed her that so many people were already up, going about their ordinary lives on this day that would define her future.
“Today's the day,” Meg said, stepping out onto the deck.
Claire forced a smile. “Yep.”
“Are you okay?”
God, how she'd come to despise that question. “Perfect.”
“Did you sleep last night?” Meg asked, coming up beside her.
“No. You?”
“No.” Meg slipped an arm around her, held her tightly.
Claire tensed, waiting for the pep talk, but her sister said nothing.
Behind them, the glass door opened. “Morning, ladies.” Bobby came up behind Claire, slid his arms around her, and kissed the back of her neck.
They stood there a minute longer, no one speaking, then they turned together and left the condo.
In no time, they were at Swedish Hospital. As they entered the Nuclear Medicine waiting room, Claire noticed the other patients who wore hats and scarves. When their gazes met, a sad understanding passed between them. They were members of a club you didn't want to join. Claire wished now that she hadn't bothered with the scarf. Baldness had a boldness to it that she wanted to embrace.
There was no waiting today, not on this day that would answer all the questions. She checked in and went right to the MRI. Within moments, she was pumped full of dye and stuck in the loud machine.
When she was finished, she returned to the waiting room and sat between Meghann and Bobby, who both reached out for her. She held their hands.
Finally, they called her name.
Claire rose.
Bobby steadied her. “I'm right here, babe.”
The three of them began the long hallway-to-hallway walk, ending finally in Dr. Sussman's office. The plaque on the door read: Chief of Neurology. Dr. McGrail, the chief of radiology,