Between Sisters - Kristin Hannah [98]
At his gate, she paused. The lights were on.
This was so unlike her.
She pushed the thought away and went to his door. There, she debated for another minute or two, then knocked.
Moments later, Joe opened the door. His hair was messed up, as if he'd been asleep; all he wore was a pair of black jeans. He waited for her to say something, but her voice had pulled a full retreat. She just stood there like an idiot, staring at his naked chest.
“You just going to stand there?”
She lifted her right hand, showing him the bottle of champagne she'd carried over.
He stared at her, saying nothing. When the silence became uncomfortable, he grabbed a black T-shirt from the sofa and put it on, then came back to the door. “I suppose you're horny. That's why you came by, right?”
She flinched at that. She thought about pulling herself up, slapping him, even, but it would be for show. A woman who screwed strangers had lost that right long ago. He was being honest, but there was something else, too. It felt as if he were angry with her. She couldn't imagine why. Even more disconcerting was the realization that she cared. “No. I thought maybe we could go out.”
“You want us to go on a date? At one o'clock in the morning?”
“Sure. Why not?”
“A better question is why.”
She looked up at him. When their gazes locked, she felt a flutter in her pulse. She couldn't possibly put the answer into words. She didn't dare look too closely at her own motivations. “Look, Joe. I was in a good mood. Maybe I had too much to drink.” Her voice stumbled; need tripped her up. Humiliated, she closed her eyes. “I shouldn't have come. I'm sorry.” When she opened her eyes, she saw that he'd moved closer. It would take nothing at all for him to kiss her now, barely a movement.
“I'm not much for going out.”
“Oh.”
“But I wouldn't mind if you wanted to come in.”
She felt the start of a smile. “Great.”
“What I mind,” he said, “is waking up alone. It's okay if you don't want to spend the night, but don't sneak out like a hooker.”
So that was it. “I'm sorry.”
He smiled. It lit up his whole face, made him look ten years younger. “Okay. Come on in.”
She touched his arm. “That's the first time I've seen you smile.”
“Yeah,” he said softly, maybe sadly. “It's been a while.”
Meghann slept through the night. When dawn came to the small, dingy cabin windows and peered inside, she woke with a start. Instead of feeling nervous and cranky—her normal moods after a sleepless night—she felt rested and relaxed. She couldn't remember the last time morning had been so sweet.
She felt the heavy weight of Joe's bare leg against her own. His arm was around her, anchoring her in place. Even in sleep, his forefinger brushed possessively against her skin.
She should move away. It was a maneuver she'd perfected over the years—the intimacy-evading sideways roll, the silent plop to the floor, the soundless dressing and unseen exit.
What I mind, he'd said last night, is waking up alone.
She couldn't sneak out.
The surprising part was that she didn't want to, not really. She sensed that she should, in that basic self-preservation kind of way, but really, it felt good to be in a man's arms again. As she lay here, listening to his slow, even breathing, feeling his arm around her, she couldn't help but realize how little intimacy she'd known in her life. She was always so in control, moving forward on the path she saw for herself, she never let herself slow down enough to feel anything. It wasn't real, of course, this intimacy she felt with Joe. They didn't know or care deeply about each other, but for Meghann, even this approximation of emotion was more than she'd felt in years.
The sex had been different last night, too. Softer, gentler. Instead of their previous I'm-going-as-fast-as-I-can coupling, they'd acted as if they had all the time in the world. His long, slow kisses had made her crazy with wanting. It wasn't simple horniness, either; at least that's what she'd thought when he'd swept