Beyond the Sky and the Earth_ A Journey Into Bhutan - Jamie Zeppa [135]
Postscript
Tshewang and I lived in Thimphu for several years, and Pema’s first words were an equal balance of English and Sharchhop. During our time in Thimphu, Tshewang and I found some of the cultural differences between us to be even greater than we had expected, and had to make some difficult decisions about our future. Eventually, I decided to return to Canada, at least “for some time,” as the Bhutanese say, and the future, well, we will see what it brings.
One of the questions I am most often asked about my life in Bhutan is “But does it feel like home to you?” In many ways, it does. I can stand on a ridge, looking at those mountains and forests and clouds forever, feeling wholly at ease, wholly at home. But I use the word “home” to refer to Canada as well. I go “home” to visit, “home” for a holiday. My grandfather phoned me often in Thimphu to see how I was, and always asked when I was coming “home.” He meant for good, not for a holiday. It was hard for him to understand that home could be, for me, two radically different places and cultures, and it remained a source of sadness and difficulty between us. He was too old to make his own journey into Bhutan, which was unfortunate, because I knew that if he could see me there, he would know that I was already home. On a November afternoon in 1996, I was having lunch at my friend Dechen’s house, and I had a sudden strong impression of my grandfather, as if he could somehow see me sitting cross-legged on the floor amongst friends, drinking warm salty butter tea and laughing as our children chased each other under the brilliant autumn sky outside. It was such a peculiar feeling that when my brother Jason phoned later to tell me that Grandpa had died that day in his sleep, I already knew.
Namé samé kadin chhé, Grandpa.
Beyond the sky and the earth, thank you.
About the Author
Jamie Zeppa was born and raised in Sault Ste. Marie, Ontario, in 1964.
She lives in Toronto and Bhutan.