Bike Snob - Anonymous [40]
Sneaker culture
iPhone culture
Tattoo culture
Video game culture
Bike culture
Style culture
Here are things referred to as “cultures” that actually are cultures:
Hopi culture
Arab culture
American culture
Polynesian culture
Buddhist culture
Throat culture
You’ll notice that the first list consists of things you have, and the second list consists of things you are (except for the last thing, which is something you get from a doctor). People in the second list use some of the things in the first list, but the fact that they do doesn’t make them who they are. If you have sneakers, an iPhone, a tattoo, and a video game console, you could be part of American culture, but you’re not necessarily multicultural. Even cultures that view tattoos as sacred are not totally defined by them. Actually being multicultural is a lot more complicated than being into both Nikes and Grand Theft Auto. In America, what people call “culture” is really “style.” That makes the idea of “style culture” especially ridiculous. Style is not culture; it’s the opposite of culture.
Nonetheless, we identify so strongly with our possessions that we’ve surrendered ourselves to them. Our willingness to call a phone a “culture” means our phones now control us. We have to feed them apps and overpriced protective coverings. Our trendy clothing is like sectarian garb. Our “culture” is indeed style.
So what does this mean? Well, it means that if you’re not into style as a lifestyle then when you see the phrase “bike culture” you better get the hell out of there or you’re going to be very disappointed. Sitting on the periphery of a big inside joke and running through a checklist of possessions with people who look exactly like one another is a major turnoff.
But the truth remains that, while cycling is mostly about riding, it’s also about the stuff beyond riding. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to revel in the history, equipment, or even the aesthetics of something that you love to do. It can be educational and inspiring, and it’s also perfectly reasonable to want to express your passion for something to the world. “Cycling” is more than just the bike, or just the riding. “Cycling” is all of it together. And yes, it’s a big part of our culture, too. So while there is no bike culture, there certainly is a cycling subculture.
Cycling Subcultures
Necessary Evil, or Unnecessary Stupidity?
Unlike “[insert possession here] cultures,” “subcultures” are actually about something, though that something is usually unimportant to anybody outside of that subculture. Simply put, they’re cliques with a mission statement. Just as damp basements are hospitable to mold and water parks attract people with un-ironic mullets and bad tattoos, cycling is an environment that fosters subcultures, and believe it or not, some of these subcultures refuse to interact with each other based almost entirely on differing attitudes towards sock height. Whether this is part of its appeal, or simply the reason non-cyclists think cyclists are geeks, is hard to say.
There are many people in this world who have the wisdom and self-assurance not to mess around with subcultures. Historically, I am sorry to say I have not been one of those people. Apart from cycling, the most significant subculture in my life was what for simplicity’s sake I’ll call “punk.” When I first saw punk clothes and heard punk music it immediately excited me. It was exactly like the scene in The Jerk when Navin Johnson hears white people’s music for the first time: “This is the kind of music that makes me want to go out there and be somebody!” Sure, going out there and being somebody mostly meant writing band names on my clothes with a Magic Marker, but it seemed no less important at the time.