Billy Connolly's Route 66_ The Big Yin on the Ultimate American Road Trip - Billy Connolly [94]
First held in August 1884, when some ranchers and cowboys got together to test their roping and riding skills and the speed of their horses, Payson’s rodeo, like all the others, is based on traditional cattle-herding practices. It involves a number of sports, including racing horses around barrels, lassoing, roping and tying down various animals, but the highlight is bareback riding of horses (called broncos) and bulls. And that’s when the clowns are an essential part of the action. They live their lives in terrible danger. They’re not just dafties doing tricks; they distract the bull from a guy that it wants to kill. And the only way they can defend themselves is by jumping into a barrel in the arena. They wear shirts and jeans that are stitched together, teamed with stripy stockings and boots, and look absolutely ridiculous. But I suppose that’s the idea – to catch the eye of the bull.
I was introduced to Rob Smeets, who told me that he and his mates didn’t call themselves clowns. The guys clutching on to the backs of the bulls called themselves bull riders, so the clowns called themselves bull fighters.
‘You know, I used to fight bulls,’ he said.
‘Really?’
‘Yeah, I used to fight bulls for twenty years. Three broken necks later, I had to quit. I then became a rodeo clown bull fighter. These days I just get the bulls away from the riders.’
‘I broke my rib last week,’ I said. ‘Now, when I think of all the people with broken ribs, there must be a high percentage among you guys.’
‘You bet. Especially pre-1989, when we lost Lane Frost, one of our world champion bull riders, at Cheyenne.’
Frost, a professional bull rider, died in the arena as a result of injuries sustained on a bull called Takin’ Care of Business. Since then, a lot of rodeo participants had worn Teflon vests.
‘The vest doesn’t make you Superman,’ said Rob, ‘but it does absorb a lot of the hit. So the safety factor has gotten better in the last twenty-plus years.’
‘And these are Braymer bulls?’
‘These are all Braymer or Braymer cross. Our sport in the last twenty-plus years has really gotten into genetics, just like for years they’ve bred good dogs. They all of a sudden said, “Boy, I’ve got a daughter out of this great bucking bull, let’s cross it with this one,” and now we’ve got some super high-bred bucking bulls.’
Next, Rob explained what happens during a competition: ‘When they give a marking at a rodeo, the judges mark out of twenty-five points on how well the rider performs, and it’s also out of twenty-five points on how well the animal performs.’ So, between them, two judges will award up to a hundred points for each ride – with half the points being earned by the bull, not the rider.
‘How long do you have to stay on?’ I asked.
‘Eight seconds, one hand. And during that eight seconds, you can’t reach and slap the animal. That one arm has got to stay up as a free arm.’
Unlike in the horse-riding events, bull riders are not required to shuffle their feet or spur the animal. They just have to maintain control. What amazed me was that the bulls, some of which weighed more than a ton, could arch, flex and twist like cats when they had a cowboy on their back. As I talked to Rob, though, they seemed quite docile. ‘How do you get them from this quiet state to that wild state?’ I asked.
‘It’s just there. It’s like pro-soccer players lying around in the locker room and then they go out there and can run and do the things that they do. The bulls are professional athletes.’
‘They know when it’s show time.’
‘Exactly. When that music starts rocking’n’rolling and the noise starts going, everybody’s adrenaline starts pounding, they know.’
‘What makes a guy want to be a bull rider?’
‘The cowboy lifestyle, the mystique, being your own boss.’
‘It’s rock’n’roll, isn’t it?’
‘It’s man against