Breaking Dawn - Stephenie Meyer [21]
Im going to try to remember you like this. Pretend that
That what? That I died?
He clenched his teeth. He was struggling with himself-with his decision to make his presence here a gift and not a judgment. I could guess what he wanted to say.
No, he finally answered. But Ill see you this way in my head. Pink cheeks. Heartbeat. Two left feet. All of that.
I deliberately stomped on his foot as hard as I could.
He smiled. Thats my girl.
He started to say something else and then snapped his mouth closed. Struggling again, teeth gritted against the words he didnt want to say.
My relationship with Jacob used to be so easy. Natural as breathing. But since Edward had come back into my life, it was a constant strain. Because-in Jacobs eyes-by choosing Edward, I was choosing a fate that was worse than death, or at least equivalent to it.
What is it, Jake? Just tell me. You can tell me anything.
I-I I dont have anything to tell you.
Oh please. Spit it out.
Its true. Its not its-its a question. Its something I want you to tell me.
Ask me.
He struggled for another minute and then exhaled. I shouldnt. It doesnt matter. Im just morbidly curious.
Because I knew him so well, I understood.
Its not tonight, Jacob, I whispered.
Jacob was even more obsessed with my humanity than Edward. He treasured every one of my heartbeats, knowing that they were numbered.
Oh, he said, trying to smother his relief. Oh.
A new song started playing, but he didnt notice the change this time.
When? he whispered.
I dont know for sure. A week or two, maybe.
His voice changed, took on a defensive, mocking edge. Whats the holdup?
I just didnt want to spend my honeymoon writhing in pain.
Youd rather spend it how? Playing checkers? Ha ha.
Very funny.
Kidding, Bells. But, honestly, I dont see the point. You cant have a real honeymoon with your vampire, so why go through the motions? Call a spade a spade. This isnt the first time youve put this off. Thats a good thing, though, he said, suddenly earnest. Dont be embarrassed about it.
Im not putting anything off, I snapped. And yes I can have a real honeymoon! I can do anything I want! Butt out!
He stopped our slow circling abruptly. For a moment, I wondered if hed finally noticed the music change, and I scrambled in my head for a way to patch up our little tiff before he said goodbye to me. We shouldnt part on this note.
And then his eyes bulged wide with a strange kind of confused horror.
What? he gasped. What did you say?
About what ? Jake? Whats wrong?
What do you mean? Have a real honeymoon? While youre still human? Are you kidding? Thats a sick joke, Bella!
I glared at him. I said butt out, Jake. This is so not your business. I shouldnt have we shouldnt even be talking about this. Its private-
His enormous hands gripped the tops of my arms, wrapping all the way around, fingers overlapping.
Ow, Jake! Let go!
He shook me.
Bella! Have you lost your mind? You cant be that stupid! Tell me youre joking!
He shook me again. His hands, tight as tourniquets, were quivering, sending vibrations deep into my bones.
Jake-stop!
The darkness was suddenly very crowded.
Take your hands off her! Edwards voice was cold as ice, sharp as razors.
Behind Jacob, there was a low snarl from the black night, and then another, overlapping the first.
Jake, bro, back away, I heard Seth Clearwater urge. Youre losing it.
Jacob seemed frozen as he was, his horrified eyes wide and staring.
Youll hurt her, Seth whispered. Let her go.
Now! Edward snarled.
Jacobs hands dropped to his sides, and the sudden gush of blood through my waiting veins was almost painful. Before I could register more than that, cold hands replaced the hot ones, and the air was suddenly whooshing past me.
I blinked, and I was on my feet a half dozen feet away from where Id been standing. Edward was tensed in front of me. There were two enormous wolves braced between him and Jacob, but they did not seem aggressive to me. More like they were trying to prevent the fight.
And Seth-gangly, fifteen-year-old Seth-had his long arms around