Breaking Dawn - Stephenie Meyer [52]
Aw, Jake-dont do that again!
Shut up, Seth, several voices thought together.
We dont want you to leave, Sam told me, his thought softer than before.
So force me to stay, Sam. Take away my will. Make me a slave.
You know I wont do that.
Then theres nothing more to say.
I ran away from them, trying very hard not to think about what was next. Instead, I concentrated on my memories of the long wolf months, of letting the humanity bleed out of me until I was more animal than man. Living in the moment, eating when hungry, sleeping when tired, drinking when thirsty, and running-running just to run. Simple desires, simple answers to those desires. Pain came in easily managed forms. The pain of hunger. The pain of cold ice under your paws. The pain of cutting claws when dinner got feisty. Each pain had a simple answer, a clear action to end that pain.
Not like being human.
Yet, as soon as I was in jogging distance of my house, I shifted back into my human body. I needed to be able to think in privacy.
I untied my shorts and yanked them on, already running for the house.
Id done it. Id hidden what I was thinking and now it was too late for Sam to stop me. He couldnt hear me now.
Sam had made a very clear ruling. The pack would not attack the Cullens. Okay.
He hadnt mentioned an individual acting alone.
Nope, the pack wasnt attacking anyone today.
But I was.
* * *
9. SURE AS HELL DIDNT SEE THAT ONE COMING
I didnt really plan to say goodbye to my father.
After all, one quick call to Sam and the game would be up. Theyd cut me off and push me back. Probably try to make me angry, or even hurt me-somehow force me to phase so that Sam could lay down a new law.
But Billy was expecting me, knowing Id be in some kind of state. He was in the yard, just sitting there in his wheelchair with his eyes right on the spot where I came through the trees. I saw him judge my direction-headed straight past the house to my homemade garage.
Got a minute, Jake?
I skidded to a stop. I looked at him and then toward the garage.
Cmon kid. At least help me inside.
I gritted my teeth but decided that hed be more likely to cause trouble with Sam if I didnt lie to him for a few minutes.
Since when do you need help, old man?
He laughed his rumbling laugh. My arms are tired. I pushed myself all the way here from Sues.
Its downhill. You coasted the whole way.
I rolled his chair up the little ramp Id made for him and into the living room.
Caught me. Think I got up to about thirty miles per hour. It was great.
Youre gonna wreck that chair, you know. And then youll be dragging yourself around by your elbows.
Not a chance. Itll be your job to carry me.
You wont be going many places.
Billy put his hands on the wheels and steered himself to the fridge. Any food left?
You got me. Paul was here all day, though, so probably not.
Billy sighed. Have to start hiding the groceries if were gonna avoid starvation.
Tell Rachel to go stay at his place.
Billys joking tone vanished, and his eyes got soft. Weve only had her home a few weeks. First time shes been here in a long time. Its hard-the girls were older than you when your mom passed. They have more trouble being in this house.
I know.
Rebecca hadnt been home once since she got married, though she did have a good excuse. Plane tickets from Hawaii were pretty pricey. Washington State was close enough that Rachel didnt have the same defense. Shed taken classes straight through the summer semesters, working double shifts over the holidays at some café on campus. If it hadnt been for Paul, she probably would have taken off again real quick. Maybe that was why Billy wouldnt kick him out.
Well, Im going to go work on some stuff I started for the back door.
Wait up, Jake. Arent you going to tell me what happened? Do I have to call Sam for an update?
I stood with my back to him, hiding my face.
Nothing happened. Sams giving them a bye. Guess were all just a bunch of leech lovers now.
Jake
I dont want to talk about it.
Are you leaving,