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“So was I,” Kevin said.

“Yes,” Teddy said. He had moved back to the far wall, as if he didn’t trust himself near me.

Lorraine had moved back with him, sitting so that their bodies touched lightly. A comforting closeness. “I, too, was thinking about her. Glad she was not here. Happy it was Anita.” She hugged her arms as if cold, and Teddy put a muscular arm around her, hugging her close, resting his chin in her hair.

“I wasn’t thinking about Raina,” Nathaniel said. He crawled towards me.

“Don’t touch me,” I said.

He rolled onto his back, for all the world like a big pussy cat wanting its belly rubbed. He stretched, straining from toes to finger tips. He laughed and rolled onto his stomach, propped on his elbows. He looked up at me, long, rich brown hair like a curtain across his face. His lilac eyes stared out at me, feral and almost frightening. He lay down in a pool of hair and energy. His gaze stayed on my face, and I realized he was being playful. Not exactly seductive, but playful. It was different and almost more disturbing. Nathaniel managed to be childlike, catlike, and still be an adult. You didn’t know whether to pat him on the head, rub his belly, or kiss him. All three seemed to be up for grabs. It was too confusing for me.

I used the far bed to get to my feet. When I was sure I could walk without falling down, I let go of the bed. I swayed just a touch, but not too bad. I could walk. Great, because I wanted out of here.

“What do you want us to do?” Stephen asked.

“Go to my house. Jean-Claude’s there, and Richard was there.”

“What about him?” Kevin asked.

Nathaniel raised his head enough to look at us all. He said nothing, asked for nothing, but I could taste his pulse in my mouth. I knew he was scared. Scared to be left alone again. I hoped this empathy with me wasn’t permanent. I had quite enough men running around in my head without adding another one.

“Take him with you,” I said. “The leopards are mine as you are mine.”

“He is to be protected and treated as pack?” Kevin asked.

I rubbed my temples. I was getting a headache. “Yes, yes. I’ve given him my protection. Any of the leopards that want my protection can have it.”

“As our lupa that binds us to protect them,” Lorraine said, “even to give our life for them. Will they do the same?”

I wasn’t getting a headache, I had one.

Nathaniel rolled to his feet in a movement that was too graceful to be real and almost too quick to see. He sat on the foot of Stephen’s bed, watching me with bright, eager eyes. He said, “My body is yours. My life, if you want it, is yours to take.” He said it almost matter-of-factly—no, joyously, like it was a good thing.

I stared at him. “I don’t want anyone’s life, Nathaniel, but if the pack is willing to risk their lives to protect you, I expect you to do the same.”

“I will do anything you want,” he said. “All you have to do is tell me.”

He didn’t say, “ask me.” He said, “tell me.” I’d never heard it phrased quite like that. It implied he didn’t have the right to say no. I asked, “Does everyone here know they have the right to argue a point with me? I mean, when I say jump, you don’t just say how high, right?”

“We don’t,” Stephen said. His face was guarded, careful.

“How about you?” I asked, turning to Nathaniel.

He rose to his knees, leaning his upper body out towards me, but with both hands still on the bed railing. He didn’t try to touch me, just get closer. “How about me, what?” he asked.

“You do understand that you have the right to refuse me? That my word is not like from on high?”

“Just tell me what you want me to do, Anita, and I’ll do it.”

“Just like that, no questions, you’ll just do it?”

He nodded. “Anything.”

“Is this a custom among the leopards, the pard?” I asked.

“No,” Stephen said, “it’s just Nathaniel’s way.”

I shook my head, literally waving my hands in the air as if I’d just erase it all. “I don’t have time for this. He’s healed. Take him with you.”

“Do you want me to wait in your room?” Nathaniel asked.