Business Networking and Sex - Ivan Misner [85]
RELIEF
I need to build my belief in my tennis acumen and myself. The more confident I feel about myself the better I will be able to play the game. Without inner confidence it just won’t happen. I may be good, but I will never be great without belief, and that belief is built in stages from seeing how I succeed over and over.
The same principles are true in developing your networking and business skills: You must gain the intellectual understanding of the particular topic matter at hand. You then need to go out and practice what you have learned. This will allow you to join book knowledge with real life. Most important, you need to develop the confidence for that skill so you become a true professional at it, and that comes with practice and effort.
You may wonder why I’m stressing these three building blocks so much when a lot of you reading this book have spent years in business and certainly know what you’re doing. Well, you may know what you’re doing, but you may just be doing the same old thing over and over. Of course you know what you’re doing; you’ve had 20 years to practice it.
Too many men think, “Please. I have been doing this for years.” There is a great old response to that which is, “So, have you been improving for 20 years or have you been repeating the first year over 20 times?” Men, let’s get some humility and realize that we have to grow and get better at communication, relationships, and business techniques. Just because you’ve been using communication, relationships, and business techniques for years certainly doesn’t mean that you’re using them well.
You may just be working very hard using tools you’re inadequately informed about. If I found you playing golf after years with a golf club and you claimed you were great because of your seasoned experience, imagine the surprise you’d feel if I pointed out that you were holding the club by the wrong end and how much better you could be if you were to turn it around. Good doesn’t mean you can’t get better. I guarantee that you can get better. By the way, when you use all the tools available to you at their full potential, you become a more skilled practitioner of your craft, and that means the returns on your investments are better with less time and effort spent. Now do I have your attention?
Why Do Men Spend More Time Networking?
Yes, I am a modern-day man, so of course I want “balance” in my life. But I want it all, including time to work and everything that encompasses, quality time with my kids, and alone time with my wife. But I see myself as the provider for my family. That means I will do whatever it takes to make my business successful. If I need to be somewhere to get business, I’ll be there.
Do men spend more time networking than women? Yes. This is our cultural imperative. When my great, great, great caveman granddaddy a million years ago went to get food for his family, he didn’t usually return home empty-handed. He just needed to do whatever it took to make it happen and however long that took; well, that’s why they wore those furry one-piece get-ups—to ward off the chill on long hunts. Their very survival was dependent on him coming home with the food. Modern-day me feels the same way. I will commit and take the time that I need to be successful.
If I go out and spend less time but don’t come home with the prize, then what was the point? It takes as much time as it takes until I get what I came for. Then I can go home.
She Says . . .
Our survey says that men spend more time networking than women do, but it appears that women get better results. At first this seemed a little confusing until I began to look