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Cat O'Nine Tales and Other Stories - Jeffrey Archer [0]

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CAN O’ NINE TALES

And Other Stories

Also by Jeffrey Archer


NOVELS

Not a Penny More, Not a Penny Less

Shall We Tell the President?

Kane & Abel

The Prodigal Daughter

First Among Equals

A Matter of Honor

As the Crow Flies

Honor Among Thieves

The Fourth Estate

The Eleventh Commandment

Sons of Fortune

False Impression


SHORT STORIES

A Quiver Full of Arrows

A Twist in the Tale

Twelve Red Herrings

To Cut a Long Story Short

The Collected Short Stories


PLAYS

Beyond Reasonable Doubt

Exclusive

The Accused


PRISON DIARIES

Volume One - Hell

Volume Two - Purgatory

Volume Three - Heaven


SCREENPLAYS

Mallory: Walking off the Map

False Impression

JEFFREY ARCHER


CAT O’ NINE TALES

And Other Stories

Drawing by Ronald searle

St. Martin’s Press New York

This is a work of fiction. All of the characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.

CAT O’ NINE TALES. Copyright © 2007 by Jeffrey Archer. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews. For information, address St. Martin’s Press, 175 Fifth Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10010.

www.stmartins.com

Drawings copyright © 2007 by Ronald Searle

ISBN-13: 978-0-312-36264-5

ISBN-10: 0-312-36264-1

First published in Great Britian by Macmillan, an imprint of Pan Macmillan Ltd.

First U.S. Edition: June 2007

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

For Elizabeth

Contents

Preface

The Man Who Robbed His Own Post Office

Maestro

Don’t Drink the water

It Can’t Be October Already

The Red King

The Wisdom Of Solomon

Know What I Mean?

Charity Begins At Home

The Alibi

A Greek Trazedy

The Commissioner

In the Eye Of The Beholder

Preface


While I was incarcerated for two years, in five different prisons, I picked up several stories that were not appropriate to include in the day-to-day journals of a prison diary. These tales are marked in the contents with an asterisk.

Although all nine stories have been embellished, each is rooted in fact. In all but one, the prisoner concerned has asked me not to reveal his real name.

The other three stories included in this volume are also true, but I came across them after being released from prison: in Athens -’A Greek Tragedy’, in London - The Wisdom of Solomon’, and in Rome my favourite - ‘In the Eye of the Beholder’.

The Man Who

Robbed His Own

Post Office

The Beginning

Mr. Justice Gray Stared down at the two defendants in the dock. Chris and Sue Haskins had pleaded guilty to the theft of £250,000, being the property of the Post Office, and to falsifying four passports.

Mr. and Mrs. Haskins looked about the same age, which was hardly surprising as they had been at school together some forty years before. You could have passed them in the street without giving either of them a second look. Chris was about five foot nine, his dark wavy hair turning gray, and he was at least a stone overweight. He stood upright in the dock, and although his suit was well worn, his shirt was clean and his striped tie suggested that he was a member of a club. His black shoes looked as if they had been spit-and-polished every morning. His wife Sue stood by his side. Her neat floral dress and sensible shoes hinted at an organized and tidy woman, but then they were both wearing the clothes that they would normally have worn to church. After all, they considered the law to be nothing less than an extension of the Almighty.

Mr. Justice Gray turned his attention to Mr. and Mrs. Haskins’s barrister, a young man who had been selected on the grounds of cost, rather than experience.

“No doubt you wish to suggest there are mitigating circumstances in this case, Mr. Rodgers,” prompted the judge helpfully.

“Yes, m’lord,” admitted the newly qualified barrister as he rose from his place. He would like to have told his lordship that this was only

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