Church Folk - Michele Andrea Bowen [100]
Precious dialed the number again. This time the hand on the other end snatched the telephone off the hook and the hello was so cold that Precious swore she saw the frost off the woman's breath coming right out of the receiver. She was nervous and said with some hesitancy in her voice. "Uh . . . uh . . . I just called you to inform you that your fiancé is cheating on us."
"I beg your pardon," Saphronia said. Precious sat perfectly still for a few seconds to gather her wits and said one more time, "I sayed that I called you to inform you that your fiancé . . . is . . . cheat-ing . . . on . . . us. Now, did you hear what I just said, Sapphire?"
Saphronia was tired and definitely not in the mood to deal with anybody's foolishness tonight—especially if it had something to do with Marcel and another woman. She thought it best to play dumb and get off the telephone as quickly as she could. She said, "I do not have the slightest idea concerning who you are and what you are talking about. But there is one thing that I know for certain. It is that you are an improper-talking nuisance, who has dialed the wrong telephone number in a moment of extreme confusion."
"Sapphire, wait," Precious insisted, knowing that Saphronia wouldn't pick up the phone if she called again. "Just listen to me a second and don't hang up."
"Why not?" Saphronia snapped, her irritation growing each second she remained in this conversation. "You do not even know me. If I heard you correctly, you are trying to reach someone named Sapphire and my name, slow woman, is Saphronia. Can you say that? Sa-phro-ni-a."
"Shoot," Precious thought, remembering how many times Marcel had stopped to correct her about Saphronia's name. She was amazed at herself for ever mistaking this stone-cold heifer for a Sapphire.
"Look, Miss McComb. That is yo' name ain't it?"
Saphronia didn't answer but she didn't hang up the telephone, either.
"Uh huh. So now, like I just sayed, you gone marry Rev. Marcel DeMarcus Brown, right?"
"I applaud you on this one. It appears as if you were able to remember his name."
Precious chose to ignore that cut and continued talking.
"Look, just give me a moment to tell you a few things about your man. In fact, me and you needs to talk face-to-face because I just caught his roaming butt red-handed in the act, if you can figure out what I mean by that. You see . . ."
Saphronia chose to ignore that cut. Of all the telephone calls she expected to receive at this conference, she never thought she would get one from one of Marcel's disgruntled women. She knew all about Marcel's reputation but assumed that all that womanizing had taken place before their engagement. But this was a woman calling her, mad because she had caught her almost married boyfriend, boss, and pastor cheating on her.
". . . And,you know Sapphire,I mean, Saphronia," Precious was saying, "I think it is time we got together to put a fix on Marcel's bumpin' 'n' grindin' behind."
Saphronia started laughing, suddenly amused by the absurdity of this entire situation. Marcel had definitely gotten his "bumpin' and grindin' " behind into some hot water when he was caught cheating on this woman. Her voice had a sliver of warmth in it when she said, "Your complaints about Marcel are quite valid. But before we continue with this conversation, I need to at least make sure that I know exactly who it is I am talking to."
Precious sighed with relief—she couldn't believe how hard it had been to get through to this woman. She looked at the clock again and realized that she was running out of time. She lowered her voice and said hurriedly, "I think you already know that it's me, Precious Powers. But, Saphronia, I gotta go right now. I think I hear someone near my room and I don't want anyone to hear me using this phone on my work hours."