Coco Chanel_ An Intimate Life - Lisa Chaney [74]
She had never been an ordinary mistress, for whom the hackneyed old explanations would have to suffice. And while her growing success seemed only to increase her allure, one commentator, imagining that this bold “queen of fashion” must have “some corners of vulgarity where one could detect the common extraction,” found that “yet she is a charming and graceful being. Neither pushing nor servile . . . a cultured and subtle mind.”24 Had the very thing attracting Arthur to Gabrielle in the first place—her difference—become too challenging for him to manage?
In making herself financially independent, even wealthy, Gabrielle had apparently made herself free—and also exposed herself to hurt. And we recall again Arthur’s prophesy to her—“You’re proud, you’ll suffer”—and his realization that thinking he’d given her a plaything, he had in fact given her freedom.25
14
Alone
Arthur’s intention to marry left Gabrielle feeling weak and abandoned. She had lost, perhaps forsaken, the only man she had ever really loved. In company with the courtesans and the mistresses whose lives she had struggled to transcend, it appeared she still wasn’t good enough to marry. More than any other person, it was Arthur who had helped Gabrielle to become the person she wanted to be. But it now seemed as if the independence she had so striven for had been earned at the cost of her heart. With an awful resignation, Morand’s Irène tells Lewis that she now believed she had been wrong to work so much. But she also recognized that now she could not turn back:
It is not a game one is free to take up or abandon. Laziness is an ornamental art, and it makes one lighter. Labour is a heavy law, with grave consequences I’m only beginning to make out today . . . everything that is happening is my fault . . . I will explain to you what you don’t dare tell me: that you [were with me] to be happy, at peace, and not to turn your house into a trading post.1
Gabrielle was unable to alter what she had become. But if her intuition had prepared her for Arthur’s news, so that she was able to conceal from him the depth of her feelings, when his rejection finally came, it broke her heart. Unforeseeably, the war had changed Arthur’s notion of commitment and he had felt honor bound to make a choice.
Once he had broken the news of his impending marriage to Gabrielle, she could no longer remain at the apartment they lived in together. Then while the Germans approached Paris and those thousands were fleeing the embattled city, Misia Edwards came to her rescue. She knew of a beautiful apartment hastily abandoned by a friend and told Gabrielle she really must take it on. The large ground-floor windows at 46 quai Debilly overlook the Seine on one side and the Trocadéro on the other. While mirrors lined the walls of the entrance hall and more filled an alcove, the ceiling shone with fine black lacquer. A huge Buddha dominated the low-level furniture and a slight scent of cocoa hung upon the air. The recent occupant was a devoted opium smoker and had been fearful that remaining in a fallen city would leave him without sources for his habit. Gabrielle was for the first time in an apartment paid for out of her own purse. She set about arranging it exactly to her liking.
In addition to finding Gabrielle a place of refuge, Misia “sent” a couple to look after her: Joseph Leclerc and his wife, Marie. These two were to prove Gabrielle’s devoted servants. In the same way, in 1913, Arthur had sent a woman named Mme. Aubert to Gabrielle at rue Cambon. Her real name was Mademoiselle de Saint-Pons, and it was she whom Gabrielle would give credit for “advising me and guiding me.”2 Despite Mme. Aubert’s flaming-red hair, she remained discreetly in the background. Invisible to the public, she helped everything at rue Cambon run smoothly and was indispensable to Gabrielle, even more so in difficult times. Her discretion was such that Gabrielle’s great-niece would later say, “Hardly