Company - Max Barry [70]
They watch Eve walk to the reception desk. “I don't get it,” Holly says. “What is it about her? She's not that fit, you know. One time I saw her at the gym, she looked like she was about to pass out.”
“You're right,” Freddy says. “You don't get it.”
Jones says, “That's true, though. You don't really know her. She could be an ax murderer for all you know.”
“With those spindly little arms?” Holly says.
“Before you were telling me to ask her out. Now what are you saying?”
“Just . . . maybe she's not right for you.”
“Jones likes her,” Holly teases.
“No, that's not it. Don't be stupid.” Jones forces himself to stop before: Why do you say that? “I'm just saying, maybe Freddy could do better.”
Freddy snorts. “No I couldn't.”
“He's right,” Holly says. “Look at him. Short, glasses, working in the same crappy job for five years . . . if Eve Jantiss agreed to date him, I'd buy lottery tickets.”
“Have you been going easy on the bicep crunches lately?” Freddy asks. “Under your arms there, it looks a bit flabby.”
Holly's mouth falls open in outrage. “My body fat percentage is fourteen.”
“Well, if you think that's good enough.” He pats his pockets. “I'm going for a smoke. I'll see you back upstairs.”
In the elevator, Jones catches Holly pinching the undersides of her arm. She drops her hands to her sides. “God, he pisses me off sometimes.”
When Freddy returns to Staff Services, he is bristling with indignation. “Do you know what they're doing?”
“Who?” Jones says.
“They made me go out back because of all the people, and I saw this new wooden fenced-in area going up next to the generator. The sign says SMOKERS' CORRAL. They're building a designated smoking area!”
Holly blows air in disgust. “I don't know why the company wants to waste money on smokers.”
“It has pictures of cows on it! Cows with cigarettes in their mouths!”
She smirks. “Oh. That's funny.”
“What gets me is they think this is helping,” Freddy complains. “Management is so out of touch, they think we'll appreciate this!” He looks to Jones for support, but Jones keeps his mouth shut. “Morons!” Freddy exclaims.
Holly says, “In the gym this morning, I heard nonsmokers will be getting an extra vacation day. Now that's a good idea.”
Freddy's mouth drops open. “What?”
“Well, I don't take five breaks a day to go stand in the sun,” Holly says. “Why shouldn't I get an extra day?”
“I make that time up! I work overtime!”
“What, I don't?”
“Bah. This is discrimination!”
“If you ask me, it's discrimination that you get time off to smoke while Jones and I don't.”
“Leave me out of this,” Jones says, before realizing how hypocritical this is.
“Besides,” Holly says, “why should you get upset about me getting a day off? It doesn't affect you.”
“You were just being a bitch about me taking five minutes for a smoke!”
“Are you calling me a bitch?” Holly yells.
Jones stands up. “Hey. Guys. Stop it, please. This is a stressful time. We need to stick together.”
Freddy takes a deep breath. “I'm sorry. You're not a bitch, Holly. But I am not going to stand in a corral with pictures of cows.”
After a moment, Holly says, “Yes you are.”
Freddy sits down with a sigh. “I hate this company so much. I wish I had been laid off.”
“No you don't.”
He laughs softly. “No, I don't. At least here I'm in good company.”
“What?” Jones says.
“I said at least here I'm in good company.”
“Oh. I thought you said you were in a good company.”
Freddy and Holly stare at him.
Jones says, “What if we could make the company better? If we could change things . . . make it a better place to work. I mean, there are so many things we could do.”
Holly looks at him blankly. Freddy says, “Jones . . . you're still new here. People suggest ways to improve the company every day. Their ideas go into the suggestion box in the cafeteria—where the cafeteria was, I mean—and they're never heard from again, except during all-staff meetings when Senior Management picks out the most useless one and announces a cross-functional