Count Bunker [35]
I scarcely see my way to do much more fishing to-day. That being so, let us come right to the point. You bring some kind of proposition from Lord Tulliwuddle, I guess?"
During his drive the Count had cogitated over a number of judicious methods of opening the delicate business; but his adaptability was equal to the occasion. In as business-like a tone as his host, he replied--
"You are quite right, Mr. Maddison. Lord Tulliwuddle has deputed me to open negotiations for a certain matrimonial project."
Mr. Maddison's expression showed his appreciation of this candor and delicacy.
"Well," said he, "to be quite frank, Count, I should have thought all the better of his lordship if he had been a little more prompt about the business."
"It is not through want of admiration for Miss Maddison, I assure you----"
"No," interrupted Mr. Maddison, "it is because he does not realize the value of time--which is considerably more valuable than admiration, I can assure you. Since I discussed the matter with Lord Tulliwuddle's aunt we have had several more buyers--I should say, suitors--in the market--er--in the field, Count Bunker. But so far, fortunately for his lordship, my Eleanor has not approved of the samples sent, and if he still cares to come forward we shall be pleased to consider his proposition."
The millionaire looked at him out of an impenetrable eye; and the Count in an equally guarded tone replied
"I greatly approve of putting things on so sound a footing, and with equal frankness I may tell you-- in confidence, of course--that Lord Tulliwuddle also is not without alternatives. He would, however, prefer to offer his title and estates to Miss Maddison, provided that there is no personal objection to be found on either side."
Mr. Maddison's eye brightened and his tone warmed.
"Sir," said he, "I guess there won't be much objection to Eleanor Maddison when your friend has seen her. Without exaggeration, I may say that she is the most beautiful girl in America, and that is to say, the most beautiful girl anywhere. The precise amount of her fortune we can discuss, supposing the necessity arrives: but I can assure you it will be sufficient to set three of your mortgaged British aristocrats upon their legs again. No, sir, the objection will not come from THAT side!"
With a gentle smile and a deprecatory gesture the Count answered, "I am convinced that Miss Maddison is all--indeed, more than all--your eloquence has painted. On the other hand, I trust that you will not be disappointed in my friend Tulliwuddle."
Mr. Maddison crossed his legs and interlocked his fingers like a man about to air his views. This, in fact, was what he proceeded to do.
"My opinion of aristocracies and the pampered individuals who compose them is the opinion of an intelligent and enlightened democrat. I see them from the vantage-ground of a man who has made his own way in the world unhampered by ancestry, who has dwelt in a country fortunately unencumbered by such hindrances to progress, and who has no personal knowledge of their defects. You will admit that I speak with unusual opportunities of forming a judgment?"
"You should have the impartiality of a missionary," said Bunker gravely.
"That is so, sir. Now, in proposing to marry my daughter to a member of this class, I am actuated solely by a desire to take advantage of the opportunities such an alliance would confer. I am still perfectly clear?"
"Perfectly," replied Bunker, with the same profound gravity.
"In consequence," resumed the millionaire, with the impressiveness of a logician drawing a conclusion from two irrefutable premises--"in consequence, Count Bunker, I demand--and my daughter demands--and my son demands, sir, that the nobleman should possess an unusual number of high-class, fire-proof, expert- guaranteed qualities. That is only fair, you must admit?"
"I agree with you entirely."
Mr. Maddison glanced at the clock and sprang to his feet.
"I have not the pleasure of knowing my neighbor, Mr. Gallosh," he said, resuming
During his drive the Count had cogitated over a number of judicious methods of opening the delicate business; but his adaptability was equal to the occasion. In as business-like a tone as his host, he replied--
"You are quite right, Mr. Maddison. Lord Tulliwuddle has deputed me to open negotiations for a certain matrimonial project."
Mr. Maddison's expression showed his appreciation of this candor and delicacy.
"Well," said he, "to be quite frank, Count, I should have thought all the better of his lordship if he had been a little more prompt about the business."
"It is not through want of admiration for Miss Maddison, I assure you----"
"No," interrupted Mr. Maddison, "it is because he does not realize the value of time--which is considerably more valuable than admiration, I can assure you. Since I discussed the matter with Lord Tulliwuddle's aunt we have had several more buyers--I should say, suitors--in the market--er--in the field, Count Bunker. But so far, fortunately for his lordship, my Eleanor has not approved of the samples sent, and if he still cares to come forward we shall be pleased to consider his proposition."
The millionaire looked at him out of an impenetrable eye; and the Count in an equally guarded tone replied
"I greatly approve of putting things on so sound a footing, and with equal frankness I may tell you-- in confidence, of course--that Lord Tulliwuddle also is not without alternatives. He would, however, prefer to offer his title and estates to Miss Maddison, provided that there is no personal objection to be found on either side."
Mr. Maddison's eye brightened and his tone warmed.
"Sir," said he, "I guess there won't be much objection to Eleanor Maddison when your friend has seen her. Without exaggeration, I may say that she is the most beautiful girl in America, and that is to say, the most beautiful girl anywhere. The precise amount of her fortune we can discuss, supposing the necessity arrives: but I can assure you it will be sufficient to set three of your mortgaged British aristocrats upon their legs again. No, sir, the objection will not come from THAT side!"
With a gentle smile and a deprecatory gesture the Count answered, "I am convinced that Miss Maddison is all--indeed, more than all--your eloquence has painted. On the other hand, I trust that you will not be disappointed in my friend Tulliwuddle."
Mr. Maddison crossed his legs and interlocked his fingers like a man about to air his views. This, in fact, was what he proceeded to do.
"My opinion of aristocracies and the pampered individuals who compose them is the opinion of an intelligent and enlightened democrat. I see them from the vantage-ground of a man who has made his own way in the world unhampered by ancestry, who has dwelt in a country fortunately unencumbered by such hindrances to progress, and who has no personal knowledge of their defects. You will admit that I speak with unusual opportunities of forming a judgment?"
"You should have the impartiality of a missionary," said Bunker gravely.
"That is so, sir. Now, in proposing to marry my daughter to a member of this class, I am actuated solely by a desire to take advantage of the opportunities such an alliance would confer. I am still perfectly clear?"
"Perfectly," replied Bunker, with the same profound gravity.
"In consequence," resumed the millionaire, with the impressiveness of a logician drawing a conclusion from two irrefutable premises--"in consequence, Count Bunker, I demand--and my daughter demands--and my son demands, sir, that the nobleman should possess an unusual number of high-class, fire-proof, expert- guaranteed qualities. That is only fair, you must admit?"
"I agree with you entirely."
Mr. Maddison glanced at the clock and sprang to his feet.
"I have not the pleasure of knowing my neighbor, Mr. Gallosh," he said, resuming