Crystal Lies - Melody Carlson [108]
I did receive one consolation during that time, albeit a bittersweet one. Sarah called me during her finals week—to apologize.
“I’m sorry, Mom,” she told me almost immediately after I said hello.
“For what, honey?” I asked. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m okay. I just wanted to say I was sorry for giving you such a bad time about Dad. I can’t believe what he did.”
“What he did?” I echoed, bracing myself for fresh pain.
“Yes. I thought he went on a business trip the week after Thanksgiving.”
“But I think you’re right, Sarah. That’s what I heard too.”
“Well, I called his secretary at work to get the number for the place where he was staying since I kept getting his message on the cell phone. I’m trying to get moved into an apartment on campus before Christmas break, and I needed him to cosign and give me a check. But it turns out that he was off on a Caribbean cruise. Betty gave me the ship’s number, and I called and left a message.”
“Oh. Did he call you back?”
“Yes. But he made up this stupid story about it being a working vacation.”
“Right.”
“So I called city hall again and asked for Judith Ramsey this time. And guess what?”
“She was gone too?”
“You got it. I asked her secretary when she’d be back and was told she was on vacation. So guess what I did?”
“I have no idea.”
“I called the same cruise ship number and asked for her and was able to leave a message.”
“Did you?” I asked. “Leave a message, I mean?”
“Yes. But I just made something up and gave a phony name.”
“I’m sorry, honey.”
“Well, I’m sorry too, Mom. I can’t believe I was blaming you for everything, and here it turns out that Dad really was messing around.”
It sounded like she was crying now. “Are you okay, honey?”
She sniffed. “Yeah, but it makes me so furious that my whole family is falling apart like this. It’s just not fair.”
I sighed, unsure what I could say to make her feel better. Maybe nothing. “Well, life doesn’t always go smoothly, Sarah, but sometimes the bumps make us stronger.”
“How’s Jacob?”
“I don’t really know. I haven’t seen him since Thanksgiving.”
“I wish he’d straighten up.”
“You and me both, Sarah.”
“I just wish the whole freaking world would straighten up,” she said in an irritated voice. “I wish everyone would just grow up and life could go back to what it was before.”
I considered this. What had life been before? The unblemished image of the happy little family living the perfect little life? But hadn’t it all been an illusion? A carefully constructed cover-up?
“Well, I hope we can all grow up too,” I finally told her. “But I don’t think life will ever go back to what it was before.” I paused. “But, who knows, maybe it will get better.”
She groaned. “I don’t possibly see how.”
Then we talked about plans for Christmas, and she told me that her dad had already given her money for a ski trip with friends. “I thought maybe I could stop in and see Grandma for a couple of days. Do you think you could come too?”
“I don’t know, Sarah…”
“Still trying to fix Jacob?”
“No…not really. I’ll tell you what, I’ll call your grandma and give it some serious thought. Okay?”
“Okay.”
“I love you, sweetie.”
“I love you, too, Mom. And I’m sorry I put all the blame on you before.”
“As I said, Sarah, we’re all a little to blame.”
“You mean me, too?”
“No, not in regard to our marriage. But you’re not perfect either, honey. I’m sure you get to take the blame for something” I laughed lightly, hoping I hadn’t hurt her feelings.
“Maybe. But I guess that’s between me and God.”
I felt a clash of feelings as I hung up the phone. I was hugely relieved that this thing between Sarah and me was finally improving. But it really stung that Geoffrey had taken