Daggerspell - Katharine Kerr [182]
“There are all sorts of crafts.”
All at once, Jill remembered that he was dweomer. He was so kind to her, so bent on winning her friendship, that at times she forgot this frightening truth. The gray gnome looked up from the floor, where he’d been amusing himself by tangling her embroidery threads, and gave her a gaping grin.
“My lord,” Jill said, her voice shaking. “You honor me too highly if you think I could take up your craft.”
“Maybe I do, maybe I don’t, but it’s a closed issue if you don’t want it. I was merely thinking about herbcraft, the plain and simple medicine I know. I’ve learned a lot in my long years, and it would be a pity to let the knowledge die with me.”
“Well, so it would.” Suddenly Jill felt her first real hope in days. “And you travel everywhere and live the way you want.”
“Just that, and you’re bright enough to learn the lore. Lovyan will understand, truly, if you want to leave. She’ll know you’ll be safe with me.”
“But what about Da? I doubt me if he’d let me go with you, and truly, we’ve been through so much together, him and me, that I’d hate to leave him, too.”
“No doubt, but at some time you have to leave him.”
Although Nevyn spoke quietly, his words cut like a knife.
“Well, why?” Jill snapped. “If I stay here—”
“And aren’t you the one who was just telling me you’re miserable?”
“Oh, so I was.”
“Just think about it. You don’t have to decide straightaway.”
Nevyn left her to the tedious task of untangling the skeins that the gnome had ruined. As she worked, Jill thought over his offer. Oddly enough, she could see herself wandering the roads with a mule and dispensing herbs to farmers much more easily than marrying some minor lord and living in comfort. While it would hurt to leave Cullyn, she could always come back and see him whenever she felt like it. It would hurt much less than being shut up in the dun with Rhodry and his new wife, seeing him every day and knowing that another woman had what was beyond her reach.
Or so Jill thought of him that morning, as beyond her reach. Toward evening, she went out in the ward just for some fresh air, and Rhodry followed her, catching her out by the wall among the storage sheds.
“My lord should be more careful about chasing after me,” Jill said. “What if someone saw you?”
“I don’t give a pig’s fart if they did or not. I’ve got to talk with you. Let’s find a place where we can be alone.”
“Oh, indeed? It’s not talk that’s on your mind.”
“It is, and it isn’t. What of it?”
Rhodry smiled at her so softly that Jill followed him when he went round to a shed to a private place in the curve of the wall.
“This will do for now,” Rhodry said. “I, uh—”
The words seemed to stick in his throat.
“Uh, well,” he started again. “You see, I had a—I mean, that sounds so cursed cold.”
“You haven’t said much yet that sounded like anything.”
“I know. Well, it’s about that bargain we made, truly.”
“I thought as much. I meant what I said, curse you.”
“Things have changed somewhat. I—”
And he stuck there again, looking at her with a feeble, foolish smile. In sheer irritation Jill started to walk away, but he grabbed her by the shoulders. When she swung round to break his hold, she tripped over the hem of her dress and nearly fell into his arms. He laughed and kissed her, held her tight when she tried to squirm away, and kissed her again so sweetly that she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him, clung to him, while she remembered all the pleasure his kisses promised.
“Leave your chamber door unbarred tonight,” Rhodry said.
“You dolt! If someone catches you, the news will be all over the dun.”
“Who’s going to be up in the middle of the night but me?” He kissed her softly, letting his mouth linger on hers. “Just leave the door unbarred.”
When Jill shoved him away, he grinned at her.
“I know you’ll do it,” Rhodry said. “Till tonight, my lady.”
In a fury of lust and rage both, Jill hiked up her skirts and ran, turning