Dark Matters_ Shadow of Heaven (Book 3) - Christie Golden [36]
Khala stuck out her fingers. Sure enough, there were little crescents of white beneath her nails. "It'll come off in the sonic shower, of course, but I think of it as kind of a trophy. And I went through the ship's computers, trying to find some music."
"Khala-"
"And there are all kinds! And they all sound different! And that's just Earth's history of music. I can't wait to start listening to Vulcan lute music, or Bolian-"
"Khala!" She stopped in midsentence, blinking at the volume of his voice. He gentled it at once. 'This is very sweet of you, and don't think I don't appreciate it. I know how unpleasant it must have been for you to cook and listen to music, and I'm flattered that you did it to make me feel better."
She was smiling now, a mysterious, sweet smile that made him feel fifteen years old again. "But you don't want me to make myself into someone I'm not just to please you, right?"
"Exactly. You're an Alilann. These are things you despise, even though they are things I love." He ran a hand through his hair, struggling for the right words. "I really care about you, but it's obvious we're too different to make this work."
She was still smiling, even though he had delivered bad news. What was going on?
Slowly, Khala walked toward him and placed a gentle hand on his arm. He knew he should pull away, not encourage her any more, not when he had decided that no matter how much he wanted this to work it never could, but he didn't. He didn't want to.
"Harry," she said softly, "I'll admit that when I came to Neelix and asked him to help me learn about the things you loved, I did so because I thought it would make you care for me more. And that first sandwich was just awful."
She wrinkled her cute little nose and Harry's heart broke a little more.
"But then, we moved on to other foods and began cooking them. I got interested in the chemical changes that took place in the process of cooking. And the smells as they cooked were just wonderful. I've smelled a prepared meal from a replicator and enjoyed it, but there's something about the fragrances the foods emit during cooking mat-mmmm! The next thing I knew I was eating fruit right off the vine and loving it. Not because you did, but because it was good! Do you see?"
He thought he did. Oh, God, he hoped he did.
"Then I began listening to samples of music in my quarters after my shifts. At first they were so strange, but then I detected the mathematical precision to music, and I began to like that too. My favorite was something called 'Jingle Bells.' Do you know it?"
"Yes," Kim managed. His chest felt oddly full.
"It made me want to laugh and move my body in a strange way. I went to the Doctor and he said this desire to move to music was called 'dancing.' I liked it. I liked all of these things, and not for you, Harry-for me. For the first time in my Me, I had a glimpse into the mind of a Culilann, and I understood how those primitive things they do give them pleasure. Because they were giving me pleasure."
Her fingers curled around his forearm, and she glanced away. Even in the dim light, he saw her cheeks flush blue.
"So I just wanted to thank you, tonight. For opening my eyes to something that I found I enjoyed so very
much. I never would have tried to learn about these things otherwise, and I would be much poorer. Please don't think you owe me anything. I understand that this is probably too late to-"
She didn't say anything more, because Harry had pulled her into his arms and was kissing her deeply. Her arms crept around his shoulders and she kissed him back.
Janeway stepped onto the bridge at 0755. Tuvok and Jenkins were already at their stations. Stephen Murphy, the young ensign who had captained the vessel during die