Darkness at Noon - Arthur Koestler [71]
barber's shop--the same way as Bogrov had been taken. The second official remained three paces behind Rubashov. Rubashov felt the impulse to turn his head round as an itching in the back of his neck, but controlled it. After all, they can't bump me oft so completely without ceremony, he thought, without being entirely convinced. At the moment it did not matter to him much; he only wished to get it over quickly. He tried to find out whether he was afraid or not, but was aware only of the physical discomfort caused by the strain of not turning hit head round towards the man behind him. When they turned the corner beyond the barber's shop, the narrow cellar staircase came into view. Rubashov watched the giant at his side to see whether he would slacken his pace. He still felt no fear, only curiosity and uneasiness; but when they had passed the staircase, he noticed to his surprise that his legs felt shaky, so that he had to pull himself together. At the same time he caught himself mechanically rubbing his spectacles on his sleeve; apparently, he must have taken them off before reaching the barber's shop without noticing it. It is all swindle, he thought. Above, it is possible to kidoneself , but below, from the stomach downwards, one knows. If they beat me now, I will sign anything they like; but tomorrow I will recall it. ... A few steps further on, the "theory of relative maturity" came to his mind again, and the fact that he had already decided to give in and to sign his submission. A great relief came over him; but at the same time he asked himself in astonishment how it was possible that he should have so completely forgotten his decisions of the last few days. The giant stopped, opened a door and stood aside. Rubashov saw a room before him similar to Ivanov's, but with unpleasantly bright lighting, which stabbed his eyes.Opposite the door, behind the desk, sat Gletkin. The door shut behind Rubashov and Gletkin looked up from his pile of documents. "Please sit down," he said in that dry, colourless tone which Rubashov remembered from that first scene in his cell. He also recognized the broad scar on Gletkin's skull; his face was in shadow, as the only light in the room came from a tall metal standing lamp behind Gletkin's armchair. The sharp white light which streamed from the exceptionally strong bulb blinded Rubashov, so that it was only after a few seconds that he became aware of a third person--a secretary sitting behind a screen at a small table, with her back to the room. Rubashov sat down opposite Gletkin, in front of the desk, on the only chair. It was an uncomfortable chair, without arms. "I am commissioned to examine you during the absence of Commissar Ivanov," said Gletkin. The light of the lamp hurt Rubashov's eyes; but if he turned his profile to Gletkin, the effect of the light in the corner of his eye was nearly as unpleasant. Besides, to talk with averted head seemed absurd and embarrassing. "I prefer to be examined by Ivanov," said Rubashov. "The examining magistrate is appointed by the authorities," said Gletkin. "You have the right to make a statement or to refuse. In your case a refusal would amount to a disavowal of the declaration of willingness to confess, which you wrote two days ago, and would automatically bring the investigation to an end. In that eventuality I have the order to send your case back to the competent authority, which would pronounce your sentence administratively." Rubashov thought this over quickly. Something had obviously gone wrong with Ivanov. Suddenly sent on leave, or dismissed, or arrested.Perhaps because his former friendship with Rubashov had been remembered; perhaps because he was mentally superior and too witty, and because his loyalty to No. 1 was based on logical considerations and not on blind faith. He was too clever; he was of the old school: the new school was Gletkin and his methods. ... Go in peace, Ivanov. Rubashov had no time for pity; he had to think quickly, and the light hindered him. He took his pince-nez off and blinked; he knew that without glasses he