Dead Reckoning - Charlaine Harris [110]
I hope some day you can forgive me, and maybe then I’ll hear the story.
Amelia
I ran a finger over the smoothness of this very dangerous object I had, and I shivered.
Warning, warning, and some more warning.
I sat at the desk for a few more minutes, lost in thought. The more I knew about fairy nature, the less I trusted fairies. Period. Including Claude and Dermot. (And especially Niall, my great-grandfather; it seemed I was always on the verge of remembering something about him, something really tricky.) I shook my head impatiently. Not the time to worry about that.
Though I’d put off admitting it as long as I could, I had to face unpleasant facts. Mr. Cataliades, through his friendship with my birth grandfather, had had more to do with my life than I’d ever guessed, and he was only revealing that to me now for reasons I couldn’t fathom. When I’d met the demon lawyer, he hadn’t quivered an eyelash in recognition.
It was all tied together somehow, and it all added up to a deep misgiving about my fairy kin. I believed that Claude, Dermot, Fintan, and Niall loved me as much as they could (for Claude, this would be quite a small amount, because he loved himself most of all). But I didn’t feel that it was a wholesome love. Though that adjective made me wince and think of Wonder Bread, it was the only one that fit.
As a sort of corollary to my increased understanding of fairy nature, I no longer doubted Gran’s word. Instead, I believed that Fintan had loved my grandmother Adele more than she’d ever realized, and in fact he’d adored her beyond the bounds of human imagination. He’d been with her much more often than she knew, sometimes taking on the guise of her husband to be in her presence. He’d taken family photos with her; he’d watched her go about her daily business; he’d probably (wince!) had sex with her while disguised as Mitchell. Where had my real grandfather been while all of this was going on? Had he still been present in his body, but unconscious? I hoped not, but I’d never know. I wasn’t sure I truly wanted to.
Because of Fintan’s devotion, he’d given my grandmother a cluviel dor. Perhaps it could have saved her life, but I didn’t believe she’d ever thought of using it. Perhaps her faith had precluded sincere belief in the power of a magical object.
Gran had stowed her letter of confession and the cluviel dor in the concealed drawer years ago to keep them safe from the prying eyes of the two grandchildren she was raising. I was sure that after she’d hidden the items that made her feel so guilty, she’d almost forgotten about them. I figured the relief of unburdening herself was so great, she’d quit worrying about the memory altogether. It must have seemed outlandish, contrasted with the daily difficulties of being a widow raising two grandchildren.
Maybe (I conjectured) from time to time she’d thought, I really should tell Sookie where those things are. But of course, she’d always supposed she’d have more time. We always do.
I looked down at the smooth object in my hand. I tried to imagine the things I could do with it. It was supposed to grant one wish, a wish for someone you loved. Since I loved Eric, presumably I could wish Victor would die, which would definitely benefit my loved one. It seemed awful to me, using a love token