Dear Cary - Dyan Cannon [131]
I wrote this book for all people everywhere who have loved and lost and fear to love again. It is possible to get the stars back in our eyes . . . and keep them there!
Acknowledgments
In writing this memoir, I have been passionately committed to giving a truthful account of my relationship with Cary, and, of course, everyone else who became a part of our lives. Mostly, it all seems like it happened yesterday, and many of the conversations and events hang as clearly in my memory as if they actually did happen yesterday. Of course, one cannot have perfect recall of conversations that happened so long ago—though in many cases, I think I get pretty close—so my guiding light in reconstructing dialogue has been to remain faithful to the way we talked to each other. I’ve taken great care to honor not merely Cary’s manner of speech but also the extraordinarily complex mind from which his words sprang.
Some names have been changed to protect privacy, and some small liberties have been taken with time and space. However, I do not see anything in the manuscript that would qualify as embellishment. Just to fill out the picture, in telling this story I have relied upon a vast number of notes, letters, and drawings from Cary that helped kindle my memory. Much has been written about Cary, and from what I’ve read, little of it is trustworthy, so mostly I’ve relied on what was at hand and in mind.
Of course, the kind of spiritual nourishment that a book such as this requires flows from one source, the power of Love and that assumes many manifestations in the form of friends and family. Naturally, there are many people to whom I owe a huge debt of gratitude.
First and absolutely foremost I wish to thank the biggest love of my life, my daughter, Jennifer, for being more than everything a mother could possibly want in a daughter; the love light that shines from your soul inspires and teaches not only me but everyone who knows you. And now our little Cary has inherited that light, that pure and perfect light that spreads limitless joy to anyone in his presence. You are a perfect mother and a perfect daughter and just plain lovely! Thank you. I love you.
Beginning with those who were formally involved with this book, I would first like to express my deep appreciation to Jeff Silberman for his steadying hand when the going got tough and for being ever ready to repeatedly assist with notes, ideas, and loving support—I could not have finished this book without him; to my literary agent, Marc Gerald, for the helpful advice and cheers; and to my editor, Mauro DiPreta, a truly special gentleman, without whose faith and abiding patience this book would not have been possible.
I will be eternally grateful for the friends who found their way into the pages of this book: My lifelong treasured friend and agent Addie, my guardian angel, and her husband, Cliff. They were always there for me (and still are); I am blessed indeed to know and love them . . . their love sustained me during the toughest times . . . My darling Darlene Jaman and my precious friend Corky Hale remain as important to my life today as they were many years ago. And of course Artis Lane, for opening the most important door of all!
I’d like to thank my dear friend Judy Baldwin for always having my back; Joelle Bercovitch for practical help and loving support even when I didn’t ask; Richard Drapkin for his listening ear and guiding light; Saku Ee for her steady assistance and inspiration during every aspect of this book; and Jennifer Schulkind and Yvette Perkins for their active help through all of it!
Of course from all of my heart to all of theirs . . . Jackie and Farzaneh for abiding sisterhood; Olga for her tireless encouragement; and the entire group from the Outreach, for their ceaseless and never-ending prayers; my wonderful Joan for all the help with the photos; and my brilliant brother, David Friesen, who inspires me in all he thinks, says, and does! And thanks to Derby for hanging in since our high school days